1
00:00:12,232 --> 00:00:17,300
♪ My heart is a singing heart ♪

2
00:00:17,366 --> 00:00:20,300
[instrumental music]

3
00:00:57,285 --> 00:01:00,285
[music continues]

4
00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:41,421
Man, look at this.

5
00:01:43,553 --> 00:01:45,732
What a sight, it's beautiful!

6
00:01:50,233 --> 00:01:54,334
♪ New York City can look awful pretty ♪

7
00:01:54,414 --> 00:01:57,671
♪ When you've been away
for quite a while ♪

8
00:01:57,871 --> 00:01:59,686
♪ So open up those honky-tonks ♪

9
00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:01,421
♪ From the Battery to the Bronx ♪

10
00:02:01,472 --> 00:02:03,972
♪ When we land,
we're gonna live it up... ♪

11
00:02:04,426 --> 00:02:05,892
In style!

12
00:02:08,166 --> 00:02:11,198
♪ If you guessing we've got addressing ♪

13
00:02:11,478 --> 00:02:14,494
♪ If you guesses, theses addresses
mean caresses ♪

14
00:02:14,668 --> 00:02:17,911
♪ If you think this little book
is packed with dynamite ♪

15
00:02:18,046 --> 00:02:20,833
♪ You're but oh so right ♪

16
00:02:21,315 --> 00:02:22,688
♪ When we hanker ♪

17
00:02:22,782 --> 00:02:24,264
♪ For what we hanker ♪

18
00:02:24,497 --> 00:02:27,394
♪ Could you hold us back?
You couldn't with an anchor ♪

19
00:02:27,727 --> 00:02:30,864
♪ Do we always feel like this
when there's a port in sight? ♪

20
00:02:30,904 --> 00:02:33,433
♪ You're but oh so right ♪

21
00:02:34,100 --> 00:02:37,678
♪ Show me a bunch of lonely sea males
who haven't been with females ♪

22
00:02:37,778 --> 00:02:39,847
♪ And I'll show you
the sickest guys for sure ♪

23
00:02:39,914 --> 00:02:41,040
- "Ah"?
- Ah!

24
00:02:41,154 --> 00:02:42,529
♪ Things cannot be tougher ♪

25
00:02:42,602 --> 00:02:44,230
♪ And that from which we suffer ♪

26
00:02:44,393 --> 00:02:46,401
♪ Nothing but a girlie's kiss can cure ♪

27
00:02:46,448 --> 00:02:47,290
- "Ah"?
- Ah!

28
00:02:47,315 --> 00:02:48,576
♪ Looking at you ♪

29
00:02:48,709 --> 00:02:50,323
♪ We're saying that you ♪

30
00:02:50,516 --> 00:02:53,220
♪ Reach a point where you would
even hug a statue ♪

31
00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,829
♪ If you think you oughta keep
your girlfriend locked up tight ♪

32
00:02:56,966 --> 00:02:59,880
♪ You're but oh so right ♪

33
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,096
♪ Who's the first gal
that you hope to see? ♪

34
00:03:03,566 --> 00:03:06,326
♪ Any gal who will
take advantage of me ♪

35
00:03:07,226 --> 00:03:09,633
♪ Where's the first place
that you hope to go? ♪

36
00:03:10,017 --> 00:03:13,833
♪ Any place at all where you could
squander your dough ♪

37
00:03:16,790 --> 00:03:20,433
♪ Those sailors who row boat
in Central Park ♪

38
00:03:20,554 --> 00:03:23,800
♪ Are very far from dim

39
00:03:24,284 --> 00:03:27,827
♪ A gal may walk back
from an auto ride ♪

40
00:03:27,881 --> 00:03:30,937
♪ But she'll think twice
before she will swim ♪

41
00:03:31,017 --> 00:03:33,927
♪ There's a real pop joint
on a most peculiar street ♪

42
00:03:35,233 --> 00:03:37,992
♪ They've got a one-armed pianist,
and his left hand can't be beat ♪

43
00:03:39,659 --> 00:03:42,296
♪ I sure can't wait to
dig that cat again ♪

44
00:03:43,951 --> 00:03:46,613
♪ He does more with five fingers
than most guys do with ten ♪

45
00:03:48,333 --> 00:03:51,266
[instrumental music]

46
00:04:12,759 --> 00:04:14,568
♪ I know you're set on celebratin' ♪

47
00:04:14,769 --> 00:04:16,429
♪ But trouble's out there waitin' ♪

48
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:19,820
♪ You're gonna wind up broke
and in a mess, you'll see ♪

49
00:04:19,906 --> 00:04:21,502
♪ Tomorrow you'll be dead heads ♪

50
00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:23,189
♪ Rolled by blondes and redheads ♪

51
00:04:23,249 --> 00:04:24,785
Is that the thing you want?

52
00:04:24,836 --> 00:04:27,514
♪ Oh yes, oh yes ♪

53
00:04:27,569 --> 00:04:28,941
♪ I'm no preacher ♪

54
00:04:29,023 --> 00:04:30,496
♪ No Sunday teacher ♪

55
00:04:30,762 --> 00:04:33,900
♪ Just a guy who likes to
help his fellow creatures ♪

56
00:04:34,022 --> 00:04:37,437
♪ If you dopes insist on
being broke tomorrow night ♪

57
00:04:37,575 --> 00:04:40,767
♪ Then your course is right

58
00:04:40,869 --> 00:04:43,997
- ♪ And we're set to sail ♪
- Beware the primrose trail.

59
00:04:44,049 --> 00:04:47,320
- ♪ We're gonna live it up ♪
- You'll taste the bitter cup.

60
00:04:47,415 --> 00:04:50,724
♪ If you think we're heading
higher than the highest kite ♪

61
00:04:50,855 --> 00:04:55,128
♪ You're but oh so right ♪

62
00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:56,937
- So wrong.
- So right!

63
00:04:57,021 --> 00:04:59,159
- So wrong!
- ♪ So right ♪

64
00:04:59,233 --> 00:05:02,996
♪ So wrong ♪

65
00:05:03,591 --> 00:05:05,798
(male announcer) <i>Now, hear this.
Now, hear this.</i>

66
00:05:05,904 --> 00:05:07,426
<i>This is the captain speaking.</i>

67
00:05:07,551 --> 00:05:09,056
<i>We're putting into the
Brooklyn Navy Yard</i>

68
00:05:09,081 --> 00:05:10,396
<i>for extensive repairs.</i>

69
00:05:10,472 --> 00:05:12,826
[all cheering]

70
00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:14,756
<i>After eight months of
active duty with you,</i>

71
00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:16,756
<i>I know a good crew when I've got one.</i>

72
00:05:17,612 --> 00:05:20,941
<i>We haven't lost a man in battle action,
and knowing the perils of shore leave,</i>

73
00:05:21,013 --> 00:05:23,816
it'd be foolish to lose a man
in that kind of action.

74
00:05:23,904 --> 00:05:25,586
You hear that? He's right.

75
00:05:26,332 --> 00:05:27,105
On the other hand,

76
00:05:27,129 --> 00:05:30,436
this ship has always operated
on the calculated risk theory.

77
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:34,107
<i>So I'm ordering all hands
to take a full 30-day shore leave.</i>

78
00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:35,241
<i>And make the most of it.</i>

79
00:05:35,291 --> 00:05:39,566
[all cheering]

80
00:05:39,633 --> 00:05:41,985
Hey, Choirboy, why don't you
come ashore with Porky and me?

81
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,056
Let your hair down!

82
00:05:43,104 --> 00:05:44,751
How 'bout lettin' some of yours
down for me?

83
00:05:45,817 --> 00:05:47,127
I'm goin' ashore, alright.

84
00:05:47,178 --> 00:05:48,968
But I'm not gonna squander my dough.

85
00:05:49,091 --> 00:05:51,545
Battle stations, fellas!
Here comes another sermon.

86
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,495
Oh, singin' ain't the only thing
he learned in that choir.

87
00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:57,057
No, he picked up some preachin', too.

88
00:05:57,217 --> 00:05:58,991
Yeah, well, you guys could use a little.

89
00:05:59,118 --> 00:06:00,907
Look, the Navy's done you a favor,

90
00:06:00,968 --> 00:06:02,729
kept you where you
couldn't spend your money.

91
00:06:02,774 --> 00:06:04,945
Now you got a little nest egg,
what're you gonna do?

92
00:06:04,995 --> 00:06:07,140
You're gonna blow every dime
on some dumb dame.

93
00:06:07,187 --> 00:06:10,003
Oh, no, one dime goes to the
phone company to call the dame.

94
00:06:10,891 --> 00:06:12,572
And after you call her, what do you got?

95
00:06:12,745 --> 00:06:14,580
"What you got?" Are you kiddin'?

96
00:06:14,634 --> 00:06:16,462
What has that book been doin' to you?

97
00:06:16,830 --> 00:06:18,270
Makin' me think.

98
00:06:18,384 --> 00:06:19,772
Makin' you think about what, Choirboy?

99
00:06:19,812 --> 00:06:21,844
Ah, Twitch, we don't
wanna hear about it.

100
00:06:21,869 --> 00:06:22,976
I wanna hear about it.

101
00:06:23,376 --> 00:06:26,332
If it wasn't for Choirboy's thinkin',
a lot of us wouldn't be here right now.

102
00:06:26,466 --> 00:06:28,775
- What's your story, 'Boy?
- Thanks, Twitch.

103
00:06:29,028 --> 00:06:29,784
Well, look...

104
00:06:29,878 --> 00:06:31,524
Eight months' back-pay
in the submarine service

105
00:06:31,548 --> 00:06:32,652
is a lotta dough, right?

106
00:06:32,705 --> 00:06:33,292
- Right.
- Right.

107
00:06:33,341 --> 00:06:35,361
Each of us has more than
a thousand bucks, right?

108
00:06:35,775 --> 00:06:38,024
Yeah, and we're gonna
spend all of it, too.

109
00:06:38,241 --> 00:06:41,241
Okay, wise guy, do what you want
with your money,

110
00:06:41,274 --> 00:06:44,531
but I'm takin' a tip from this little book
as to what to do with mine.

111
00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:48,315
- Hey, Choirboy.
- Yeah?

112
00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:51,064
- Lemme look at that book, huh?
- Go right ahead, Twitch.

113
00:06:52,906 --> 00:06:54,727
"Making My First Million"...

114
00:06:54,765 --> 00:06:56,359
...by B.P. Morrow.

115
00:06:57,110 --> 00:06:57,744
Who's he?

116
00:06:58,100 --> 00:06:59,826
President of Morrow and
Peabody and Company,

117
00:06:59,881 --> 00:07:01,828
the biggest stockbrokers on Wall Street.

118
00:07:01,967 --> 00:07:05,025
Started with 50 bucks.
Bought stock low and sold it high.

119
00:07:05,213 --> 00:07:08,746
Buy low, sell high?
This, you gotta learn from a book?

120
00:07:08,853 --> 00:07:11,558
- You gonna buy stock?
- I'm calling on Mr. Morrow personally.

121
00:07:11,826 --> 00:07:14,307
Whatever he says buy, I'm buying.

122
00:07:14,460 --> 00:07:16,422
Why, I'll double my money,
maybe even triple it.

123
00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:17,805
Could be, with your luck.

124
00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:20,088
Why, double my dough,
I could buy me a couple cabs,

125
00:07:20,134 --> 00:07:21,908
could be business for myself
when I get outta the Navy.

126
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:22,548
You're right.

127
00:07:22,607 --> 00:07:25,572
Double mine, I could make a down payment
on that little chicken farm in Jersey!

128
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:27,307
I could have my own restaurant!

129
00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:29,349
What's good enough for Choirboy
is good enough for me.

130
00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:30,251
And you.

131
00:07:30,290 --> 00:07:32,105
Me too, I got nothin' against
makin' money.

132
00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:33,580
It's better than losin' it
in a crap game.

133
00:07:33,604 --> 00:07:35,030
Hey, fellas, come on and get in on this.

134
00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:36,849
Double your dough overnight
in the stock market!

135
00:07:36,879 --> 00:07:38,752
- Hey, count me in!
- Hey, listen, you know, guys...

136
00:07:39,073 --> 00:07:42,462
He doubles our money by tomorrow,
we still got 29 days' leave left.

137
00:07:42,573 --> 00:07:44,944
Sure! Look, there's more than
50 of us aboard.

138
00:07:45,019 --> 00:07:47,808
That's over 50 grand between us.
We can form our own company.

139
00:07:47,987 --> 00:07:50,577
With Choirboy as president,
we can plant our dough with his.

140
00:07:50,833 --> 00:07:51,784
A money orchard!

141
00:07:52,466 --> 00:07:53,714
Who, me? Oh, no.

142
00:07:53,820 --> 00:07:55,795
What's the matter, you wanna keep
a good thing all to yourself?

143
00:07:55,903 --> 00:07:57,657
- 'Course not!
- You wanna hog all the profits?

144
00:07:57,713 --> 00:07:59,692
No! I just don't want
the responsibility.

145
00:07:59,793 --> 00:08:02,207
Look, me and Porky'll go with you.
Don't worry about it.

146
00:08:02,241 --> 00:08:04,170
- Get the dough, Porky.
- Oh, now, wait a minute, fellas...

147
00:08:04,195 --> 00:08:05,872
- We're shipmates, ain't we?
- 'Course, we're shipmates...

148
00:08:05,912 --> 00:08:08,895
We want in, understand?
Here, put me down for a thousand.

149
00:08:08,921 --> 00:08:12,685
[indistinct shouting]

150
00:08:12,833 --> 00:08:14,154
Wait a minute!

151
00:08:14,226 --> 00:08:15,657
Here's my five hundred.

152
00:08:15,875 --> 00:08:17,830
- Five hundred?
- A spy.

153
00:08:17,887 --> 00:08:25,827
[all shouting]

154
00:08:25,893 --> 00:08:28,215
Wall Street, here we come!

155
00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:32,303
[indistinct chattering]

156
00:08:32,565 --> 00:08:34,981
(Choirboy) Come on, you guys!
Hurry up, come on!

157
00:08:35,047 --> 00:08:40,981
[chattering continues]

158
00:08:47,306 --> 00:08:57,871
[instrumental music]

159
00:09:06,593 --> 00:09:08,593
Hey, look, mates,
they finally found a door that fits me.

160
00:09:08,646 --> 00:09:10,743
A ring-a-ding-a-ding-ding-ding...

161
00:09:12,859 --> 00:09:14,981
- What're you doing?
- I travel the best circles.

162
00:09:15,173 --> 00:09:16,639
Come on!

163
00:09:21,902 --> 00:09:23,596
Something I can do for you fellas?

164
00:09:24,597 --> 00:09:26,319
We'd like to make some investments.

165
00:09:26,413 --> 00:09:27,935
So would I, son. But it takes money.

166
00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,156
- Money?
- Money?

167
00:09:34,154 --> 00:09:35,475
Money.

168
00:09:36,289 --> 00:09:37,090
Where did you get that?

169
00:09:37,353 --> 00:09:38,244
We just got paid!

170
00:09:38,269 --> 00:09:40,594
You shoulda seen that before
they took out the withholding tax.

171
00:09:40,873 --> 00:09:42,535
Yes, but...
But aren't you fellas sailors?

172
00:09:42,602 --> 00:09:44,718
Sailors? Yachtsmen.

173
00:09:45,832 --> 00:09:47,095
Oh, yes, yes, of course,

174
00:09:47,126 --> 00:09:49,389
well, Mr. Morrow takes care of
all new clients personally.

175
00:09:49,742 --> 00:09:51,458
This way, gentlemen, please.

176
00:09:54,734 --> 00:09:57,219
Oh, Miss Brown, these gentlemen
would like to see Mr. Morrow

177
00:09:57,244 --> 00:09:58,631
about some investments.

178
00:09:59,653 --> 00:10:02,097
- I'm a very busy man.
- So let's close the deal quick!

179
00:10:02,122 --> 00:10:03,865
But I am not interested
in your proposition...

180
00:10:03,890 --> 00:10:05,819
- 'Cause you haven't heard it!
- I told you...

181
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:08,561
- You're a busy man...
- I'm sorry, he's in conference.

182
00:10:08,795 --> 00:10:11,778
How did you get in here anyway?
Who gave you an appointment...

183
00:10:11,804 --> 00:10:15,048
Mr. Morrow, opportunity doesn't need
an appointment, it only knocks once.

184
00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:16,209
Will you please listen?

185
00:10:16,255 --> 00:10:18,617
Mr. Woods, this is an investment house.

186
00:10:18,651 --> 00:10:20,269
We do not put money in shows.

187
00:10:20,335 --> 00:10:22,569
Oh, but you never seen
a show like this before!

188
00:10:22,628 --> 00:10:25,151
I brought Miss Weston down here
to give you a personal audition.

189
00:10:25,255 --> 00:10:28,555
I'm trying to make you understand,
I don't want an audition.

190
00:10:28,642 --> 00:10:30,810
Oh, I wouldn't want you
to buy a pig in a poke.

191
00:10:30,842 --> 00:10:33,178
I want you to know what you're gettin'.
Sing it, honey.

192
00:10:33,275 --> 00:10:35,235
Listen. You'll love her.

193
00:10:42,615 --> 00:10:48,474
♪ I was raised in an atmosphere
of decorum and propriety ♪

194
00:10:49,062 --> 00:10:52,512
♪ I was taught that a brat must fear ♪

195
00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:55,668
♪ The scorn of polite society ♪

196
00:10:55,748 --> 00:10:58,985
♪ There are things you do and don't do ♪

197
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:02,395
♪ That's the way it was taught to me ♪

198
00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:07,166
♪ There are things you do and don't do ♪

199
00:11:07,328 --> 00:11:14,801
♪ But speaking romantically ♪

200
00:11:15,073 --> 00:11:18,084
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me, kiss me,
or I'll scream ♪

201
00:11:18,798 --> 00:11:19,599
[screaming]

202
00:11:19,625 --> 00:11:22,169
♪ You better pucker up
and kiss me or I'll ♪

203
00:11:22,448 --> 00:11:23,956
♪ Blow my top ♪

204
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:26,432
♪ What's with all the conversation ♪

205
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,602
♪ 'Bout the national debt ♪

206
00:11:28,701 --> 00:11:32,445
♪ I could get more oscillation
from an old Civil War bet ♪

207
00:11:32,711 --> 00:11:36,129
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me, kiss me,
or I'll scream ♪

208
00:11:36,497 --> 00:11:37,265
[screaming]

209
00:11:37,290 --> 00:11:41,321
♪ You better put your arms around me
or I'll call a cop ♪

210
00:11:41,754 --> 00:11:43,776
♪ You're making an absolute nightmare ♪

211
00:11:43,896 --> 00:11:45,885
♪ Of a perfectly wonderful dream ♪

212
00:11:46,058 --> 00:11:48,910
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me,
kiss me, kiss me ♪

213
00:11:49,014 --> 00:11:54,514
♪ Or I'll scream

214
00:11:54,688 --> 00:11:56,988
[screaming]

215
00:11:57,637 --> 00:11:59,244
Sensational, eh?

216
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,694
Miss Penny alone
could put this show in clover.

217
00:12:01,780 --> 00:12:04,064
But I'm like a banker, Mr. Morrow,
I got collateral.

218
00:12:04,435 --> 00:12:06,702
Emilio Rossi, the great opera star.

219
00:12:06,939 --> 00:12:07,635
Think of it,

220
00:12:07,659 --> 00:12:09,956
for the first time on any
musical comedy stage,

221
00:12:10,002 --> 00:12:11,738
he dances, he acts, he makes love.

222
00:12:11,784 --> 00:12:13,366
Scenes, tear your heart out.

223
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:15,695
- Box office'll make you rich.
- I <i>am</i> rich.

224
00:12:15,882 --> 00:12:16,622
Richer!

225
00:12:16,700 --> 00:12:19,828
Think of it...
Emilio Rossi, the great lover.

226
00:12:21,335 --> 00:12:23,522
Dr. Rossi in surgery.

227
00:12:23,869 --> 00:12:25,769
General Rossi at Waterloo.

228
00:12:26,020 --> 00:12:27,240
I am not interested...

229
00:12:27,287 --> 00:12:28,569
[phone buzzing]

230
00:12:28,595 --> 00:12:30,963
He's not here. Get a load of this scene.

231
00:12:31,101 --> 00:12:33,760
A farmhouse in Minnesota,
snowing outside,

232
00:12:33,847 --> 00:12:34,994
the front door opens.

233
00:12:35,169 --> 00:12:37,450
Emilio Rossi, the tycoon, enters.

234
00:12:37,587 --> 00:12:38,865
Ham at last...

235
00:12:39,118 --> 00:12:39,920
<i>Home</i> at last.

236
00:12:40,182 --> 00:12:41,895
His poor mother
is scrubbing the ceiling...

237
00:12:42,302 --> 00:12:44,116
Scrubbing the ceiling?
A twist!

238
00:12:44,170 --> 00:12:46,940
- Get this scene, Mr. Morrow...
- I don't want to hear the scene!

239
00:12:46,973 --> 00:12:49,469
You're right.
What are scenes in a musical? Nothing.

240
00:12:49,495 --> 00:12:51,772
- You're a smart showman...
- I am not a showman!

241
00:12:51,831 --> 00:12:53,700
...music makes it, dancing, costume.

242
00:12:53,826 --> 00:12:55,882
Sing the second chorus, honey.
Hit it, baby!

243
00:12:55,928 --> 00:12:59,066
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me, kiss me,
or I'll yelp ♪

244
00:12:59,632 --> 00:13:00,760
- Help!
- Stop it!

245
00:13:01,976 --> 00:13:03,716
Will you stop peekin' and listen?

246
00:13:03,769 --> 00:13:06,064
You're disrupting
the whole organization!

247
00:13:06,128 --> 00:13:08,161
Will you please put your clothes on?

248
00:13:08,202 --> 00:13:10,256
Look, this is the biggest show
since "Oklahoma!"

249
00:13:10,402 --> 00:13:12,198
It's bigger than "Oklahoma!"

250
00:13:13,195 --> 00:13:14,460
Please! Stop it!

251
00:13:14,974 --> 00:13:16,483
Will you please put your clothes on?

252
00:13:16,556 --> 00:13:18,528
All I need is money for a tryout.

253
00:13:18,575 --> 00:13:20,539
Not that it needs a tryout,
it's a smash.

254
00:13:20,574 --> 00:13:21,900
Men like you can save it.

255
00:13:21,955 --> 00:13:24,269
We do not put money in shows!

256
00:13:24,935 --> 00:13:26,626
Oh, no! No!

257
00:13:26,799 --> 00:13:29,569
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me,
kiss me, kiss me ♪

258
00:13:29,635 --> 00:13:32,111
♪ Or I'll ♪

259
00:13:32,654 --> 00:13:36,823
[screaming]

260
00:13:36,943 --> 00:13:38,891
- Isn't she the greatest?
- Officer!

261
00:13:38,932 --> 00:13:41,508
Look... you could be a
big producer, Mr. Morrow.

262
00:13:41,541 --> 00:13:43,249
What do you wanna be?
Just another millionaire?

263
00:13:44,002 --> 00:13:45,335
[door rattling]

264
00:13:45,402 --> 00:13:48,274
Opportunity is knockin',
why don't you take advantage of it?

265
00:13:48,321 --> 00:13:50,163
- Hey! Oh.
- Throw this man out!

266
00:13:50,215 --> 00:13:52,097
I thought you were a man of vision.

267
00:13:52,134 --> 00:13:54,329
When my show is playin' to
standing room on Broadway,

268
00:13:54,354 --> 00:13:55,420
I wouldn't let you in the theatre.

269
00:13:55,482 --> 00:13:57,555
- Put him out!
- Hold off, you storm trooper!

270
00:13:57,601 --> 00:13:59,278
You'll hear from my lawyers!

271
00:14:00,012 --> 00:14:02,221
Violence'll get you nowhere!

272
00:14:02,702 --> 00:14:05,124
I wouldn't deal with
this fly-by-night outfit!

273
00:14:05,194 --> 00:14:07,361
Never have I seen such mismanagement.

274
00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:08,936
Mismanagement?

275
00:14:10,402 --> 00:14:13,953
No wonder Securities Exchange Commission
is investigating you!

276
00:14:14,102 --> 00:14:15,448
Investigation?

277
00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,905
Lucky thing this joint
is at the ground floor.

278
00:14:18,965 --> 00:14:22,362
Clients'll be jumpin' outta windows...
comes the crash!

279
00:14:22,709 --> 00:14:23,536
Crash?

280
00:14:23,809 --> 00:14:25,648
Get off me!

281
00:14:26,415 --> 00:14:29,054
Gentlemen, gent...
There is no cause for alarm.

282
00:14:29,115 --> 00:14:32,191
I assure you,
your investments are absolutely safe.

283
00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:34,073
Come clean, Morrow.
Are you being investigated?

284
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:36,643
- Are you anticipating a crash?
- What about my investments?

285
00:14:36,757 --> 00:14:38,311
We want the truth, Morrow.

286
00:14:38,497 --> 00:14:41,370
Gentlemen, there is no cause for panic.
It's all a mistake.

287
00:14:41,454 --> 00:14:43,215
This is a very conservative house.

288
00:14:43,276 --> 00:14:44,750
Conservative house, indeed!

289
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:46,045
May I have my skirt, please?

290
00:14:46,112 --> 00:14:47,266
Take it and get out!

291
00:14:47,335 --> 00:14:48,608
She doesn't belong here.

292
00:14:48,968 --> 00:14:50,823
Gosh... she's beautiful.

293
00:14:50,930 --> 00:14:52,569
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.

294
00:14:53,819 --> 00:14:56,603
Mr. Woods,
this is just terribly embarrassing.

295
00:14:56,883 --> 00:14:59,198
Are you certain Judy Garland
started like this?

296
00:14:59,262 --> 00:15:01,507
Oh... don't let it get you down, honey.

297
00:15:01,561 --> 00:15:04,731
Now, I'm not doing any more singing
unless it's on a stage.

298
00:15:04,958 --> 00:15:06,826
Hey, we gotta blow this joint
before somebody gets hurt.

299
00:15:06,871 --> 00:15:08,822
- You know, they always blame the Navy.
- They certainly do.

300
00:15:10,209 --> 00:15:12,142
[coughing]

301
00:15:12,859 --> 00:15:16,035
Are you gonna let me down?
Ain't I trying to get a theatre?

302
00:15:16,302 --> 00:15:19,771
They cost money, but this is Wall Street,
there must be a bankroll some place.

303
00:15:19,848 --> 00:15:21,700
Come on, let's try
J.P. Morgan and Company.

304
00:15:21,795 --> 00:15:22,962
But, Mr. Woods..

305
00:15:23,082 --> 00:15:24,658
You fellas see a crowd?

306
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:26,079
Why? You lookin' for one?

307
00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:28,087
Ho-ho, that's funny.

308
00:15:28,127 --> 00:15:31,044
I beg your pardon, sir,
but what you said inside, is that true?

309
00:15:31,117 --> 00:15:32,235
Probably.

310
00:15:32,438 --> 00:15:35,154
Well, if it is,
we certainly owe you a vote of thanks.

311
00:15:35,342 --> 00:15:37,709
We were gonna invest $50,000.

312
00:15:39,469 --> 00:15:41,848
Did you say... Did I hear...

313
00:15:41,934 --> 00:15:43,869
Have you got... Where is it?

314
00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:45,711
- Where's what?
- The 50,000.

315
00:15:45,888 --> 00:15:48,274
Oh. That's right in here.

316
00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:50,883
(Porky) You wanna count it, matey?

317
00:15:51,149 --> 00:15:53,313
So that's what you guys
carry in them bags.

318
00:15:53,539 --> 00:15:56,136
- Son, this is your lucky day.
- Yeah.

319
00:15:56,522 --> 00:15:58,246
It just so happens I'm in a position

320
00:15:58,271 --> 00:16:00,199
to let some shrewd operator
take advantage of me.

321
00:16:00,353 --> 00:16:01,748
How would you like to double your money?

322
00:16:01,941 --> 00:16:02,910
Well, I don't know...

323
00:16:02,935 --> 00:16:04,937
You don't know?
You know what two and two is, don't you?

324
00:16:05,074 --> 00:16:06,859
- Yeah... four!
- That's sharp.

325
00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:09,168
You're in the right town,
but you picked the wrong street.

326
00:16:09,248 --> 00:16:10,950
Broadway is where you invest.

327
00:16:11,110 --> 00:16:12,291
Hey, taxi!

328
00:16:13,402 --> 00:16:14,914
- Pardon me.
- Come on, son!

329
00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:16,369
Wait a minute. Where're we going?

330
00:16:16,435 --> 00:16:19,702
To see the greatest show in the world,
starring Emilio Rossi.

331
00:16:19,785 --> 00:16:21,994
Miss Weston's the leading lady,
she's comin' too.

332
00:16:22,094 --> 00:16:24,037
- Oh, fine.
- Come on, let's go.

333
00:16:24,089 --> 00:16:27,086
Alright, fellas.
Hop in, hop in. Let's go.

334
00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:29,648
Come on! This could be a break for us.

335
00:16:29,681 --> 00:16:31,833
Mr. Woods, you can't
take money from these boys,

336
00:16:31,858 --> 00:16:32,718
they're in the Navy.

337
00:16:32,761 --> 00:16:35,080
So? If I make 'em rich, it's patriotic.

338
00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:36,362
Come on!

339
00:16:36,802 --> 00:16:39,171
I, uh...
I don't believe I got your name.

340
00:16:39,252 --> 00:16:41,146
Woods. Joe Woods Production.

341
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:43,029
This is Miss Penny Weston,
our leading lady.

342
00:16:43,202 --> 00:16:45,131
- Twitch.
- So I get this idea, see?

343
00:16:45,364 --> 00:16:47,067
Miss Penny is good, but no-name.

344
00:16:47,179 --> 00:16:48,794
Emilio Rossi, he's got the name.

345
00:16:48,830 --> 00:16:50,336
- But no good?
- The greatest.

346
00:16:50,436 --> 00:16:52,405
Now, I got the show in the bag,
you got the dough in the bag.

347
00:16:52,454 --> 00:16:55,100
Let's get together.
This is the biggest show since "Oklahoma!"

348
00:16:55,167 --> 00:16:57,939
The title alone, "Texas,"
it's bigger than Oklahoma.

349
00:16:57,964 --> 00:16:58,769
What do you say?

350
00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:02,155
I don't think we ought to
invest in show business, Mr. Woods.

351
00:17:02,221 --> 00:17:03,362
We don't know anything about it.

352
00:17:03,683 --> 00:17:05,791
Oh, we know something
about it, Choirboy.

353
00:17:05,912 --> 00:17:07,569
We put on pretty good shows aboard ship.

354
00:17:07,635 --> 00:17:09,048
Kinda took care of
the entertainment, y'know?

355
00:17:09,548 --> 00:17:12,135
Oh, but Twitch, that was just
little things about the Navy.

356
00:17:12,202 --> 00:17:13,469
Songs and dances.

357
00:17:13,535 --> 00:17:15,469
You put on shows about the Navy?

358
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,624
- Yeah.
- Incredible!

359
00:17:18,444 --> 00:17:20,867
I tell ya, it gives a man pause.

360
00:17:21,507 --> 00:17:23,469
That's what this show's about.
The Navy.

361
00:17:23,735 --> 00:17:25,451
I thought you said it was about Texas.

362
00:17:25,549 --> 00:17:28,140
Well, I call it "Texas" for short.

363
00:17:28,228 --> 00:17:30,623
Actually, it's "The USS Texas."

364
00:17:30,796 --> 00:17:32,738
This show is loaded with Navy scenes.

365
00:17:32,832 --> 00:17:34,286
Sing 'em the Navy ballad, honey.

366
00:17:34,442 --> 00:17:36,569
- The Navy ballad?
- Shy.

367
00:17:36,689 --> 00:17:40,099
"The Navy ballad?" The Navy ballad!
Navy ballad, same as any other ballad.

368
00:17:40,175 --> 00:17:43,403
Boy meets girl, girl meets boy.
Same as any other ballad.

369
00:17:43,522 --> 00:17:45,825
Sailors know about that, don't they?
Sing them the navy ballad.

370
00:17:46,502 --> 00:17:48,674
Sing it, honey, the Navy ballad!

371
00:17:53,935 --> 00:17:57,169
♪ The lightning seems to fly ♪

372
00:17:57,235 --> 00:17:59,769
♪ Across the summer sky ♪

373
00:17:59,824 --> 00:18:06,112
♪ And shooting stars
begin to fall around you ♪

374
00:18:06,702 --> 00:18:12,458
♪ The most amazing things take place ♪

375
00:18:12,574 --> 00:18:16,896
♪ Each time that we come face to face ♪

376
00:18:17,075 --> 00:18:20,627
♪ And simply 'cause you're there ♪

377
00:18:20,706 --> 00:18:23,709
♪ There's music everywhere ♪

378
00:18:23,781 --> 00:18:29,695
♪ The melodies I hear
would just astound you ♪

379
00:18:29,768 --> 00:18:35,802
♪ And they invite us to embrace ♪

380
00:18:36,367 --> 00:18:40,981
♪ Each time that we come face to face ♪

381
00:18:41,935 --> 00:18:45,998
♪ And when you aren't near ♪

382
00:18:46,081 --> 00:18:52,048
♪ The world's a wintery thing ♪

383
00:18:52,311 --> 00:18:56,544
♪ But then when you are here ♪

384
00:18:56,608 --> 00:19:00,469
♪ It's spring again ♪

385
00:19:00,632 --> 00:19:04,202
♪ It's spring ♪

386
00:19:04,269 --> 00:19:07,202
♪ The first time that we kissed ♪

387
00:19:07,269 --> 00:19:10,383
♪ I heard my heart insist ♪

388
00:19:10,435 --> 00:19:13,401
♪ "Don't ever let him go..." ♪

389
00:19:13,488 --> 00:19:18,004
♪ "...now that he's found you" ♪

390
00:19:18,675 --> 00:19:25,265
♪ And though the skies be gray or blue ♪

391
00:19:26,288 --> 00:19:32,350
♪ You face them face to face ♪

392
00:19:32,509 --> 00:19:39,846
♪ With you ♪

393
00:19:40,528 --> 00:19:43,361
- Ain't she the greatest?
- So-lid!

394
00:19:44,370 --> 00:19:47,560
[piano music]

395
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:55,402
[car honking]

396
00:19:55,469 --> 00:19:56,435
[tires screeching]

397
00:20:01,388 --> 00:20:03,788
Stop! Stop! Stop!

398
00:20:03,882 --> 00:20:05,482
Enough of all this!

399
00:20:05,635 --> 00:20:07,835
This is disgraceful!

400
00:20:07,943 --> 00:20:11,483
Emilio Rossi... rehearsing in a garage.

401
00:20:11,515 --> 00:20:13,479
Mr. Rossi...

402
00:20:13,839 --> 00:20:18,451
I know all this noise must be a strain
to your, uh, artistic nerves...

403
00:20:18,697 --> 00:20:21,981
...but do I dare to presume
you're in the mood to rehearse?

404
00:20:22,107 --> 00:20:24,991
Well, as a true artist, which I am...

405
00:20:25,295 --> 00:20:26,586
...I will try.

406
00:20:30,181 --> 00:20:33,125
Come away with me, my love.

407
00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:35,941
Let me take you out of all this...

408
00:20:36,048 --> 00:20:38,681
...into poverty and misery.

409
00:20:38,715 --> 00:20:40,245
Mr. Rossi...

410
00:20:40,952 --> 00:20:42,148
The line is...

411
00:20:42,261 --> 00:20:45,678
"Let me take you out of
all this poverty and misery."

412
00:20:45,930 --> 00:20:48,327
Not "into poverty and misery."

413
00:20:48,493 --> 00:20:49,683
That wouldn't make any sense.

414
00:20:49,969 --> 00:20:53,452
Well, if it doesn't make any sense,
why did you write it?

415
00:20:54,169 --> 00:20:55,541
Is anything else wrong?

416
00:20:59,302 --> 00:21:01,527
Come away with me, my love...

417
00:21:01,588 --> 00:21:02,942
[crashing]

418
00:21:05,302 --> 00:21:06,792
[metal clanking]

419
00:21:06,908 --> 00:21:11,384
Am I to be scorned
in this smelly New York garage?

420
00:21:12,429 --> 00:21:14,462
Where is Mr. Woods?

421
00:21:14,679 --> 00:21:16,688
He's out raising money, Mr. Rossi.

422
00:21:16,948 --> 00:21:19,191
So as we can rent a theatre
for you to be scorned in.

423
00:21:19,348 --> 00:21:21,100
Uh, I mean, rehearse in.

424
00:21:21,589 --> 00:21:22,877
Wait a minute.

425
00:21:23,048 --> 00:21:25,150
There's a phone call
for the Woods Production.

426
00:21:25,568 --> 00:21:27,479
Will you excuse me?

427
00:21:28,967 --> 00:21:30,202
Thank you.

428
00:21:31,469 --> 00:21:34,139
Joe Woods Productions, good afternoon.

429
00:21:34,981 --> 00:21:36,582
Oh, I am sorry.

430
00:21:36,635 --> 00:21:39,952
Well, deposit the check again,
I'm sure it'll clear this time.

431
00:21:41,028 --> 00:21:44,036
Well, they say
the third time is a charm.

432
00:21:44,802 --> 00:21:48,160
Oh, I'm so sorry,
Mr. Woods is not here right now.

433
00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:02,047
Well, here we are.

434
00:22:02,269 --> 00:22:03,649
Say, Mr. Woods...

435
00:22:03,855 --> 00:22:05,303
You rehearse in a garage?

436
00:22:05,477 --> 00:22:08,863
- Hey, maybe it's an auto show, huh?
- Oh, Rossi's idea. He demands realism.

437
00:22:08,888 --> 00:22:11,216
He's got a scene in the garage,
so he rehearses in a garage.

438
00:22:11,241 --> 00:22:13,259
Hey, got any scenes
in the girls' dormitory?

439
00:22:14,254 --> 00:22:17,616
The costume people just called again
about those bad checks!

440
00:22:18,213 --> 00:22:19,611
I'll say those checks were bad,

441
00:22:19,636 --> 00:22:23,870
I told 'em a dozen times I want stripes
in those ballet skirts, not checks.

442
00:22:24,402 --> 00:22:27,780
Honey, introduce the boys to Rossi.
See you in a minute, fellas.

443
00:22:30,100 --> 00:22:32,731
Don't you know better than to talk about
bad checks in front of investors?

444
00:22:32,820 --> 00:22:34,125
The sailors?

445
00:22:34,313 --> 00:22:35,847
You see that sailor with a duffel bag?

446
00:22:35,872 --> 00:22:38,270
He's loaded!
He's got over 50 grand in that bag.

447
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:40,287
Where would sailors
get that kinda money?

448
00:22:40,384 --> 00:22:42,118
How do I know? Maybe they're pirates.

449
00:22:42,287 --> 00:22:43,690
They're good for what we need.

450
00:22:43,969 --> 00:22:45,618
What did I do with
those unsigned contracts?

451
00:22:45,710 --> 00:22:48,077
In your office, with the unpaid bills.

452
00:22:53,467 --> 00:22:54,341
Hey, wait a minute.

453
00:22:55,888 --> 00:22:59,117
How many times I gotta tell you
to stay out of the customers' cars?

454
00:22:59,197 --> 00:23:01,684
This morning you ran the battery down
in Mr. McEwen's Lincoln...

455
00:23:01,751 --> 00:23:03,084
...with your electric razor!

456
00:23:03,128 --> 00:23:06,251
So charge it to me.
Ha, get it? Charge it to me!

457
00:23:08,180 --> 00:23:09,928
Listen, this is no
laughing matter, Woods.

458
00:23:09,989 --> 00:23:11,556
Now, you get your laundry
outta this car,

459
00:23:11,582 --> 00:23:14,460
and you and your crowd clear outta here,
I'm tryin' to run a legitimate business.

460
00:23:14,684 --> 00:23:16,088
Oh, don't give us that.

461
00:23:16,158 --> 00:23:19,365
You got customers' cars parked on
side streets clear up to the Bronx!

462
00:23:19,411 --> 00:23:21,600
Only so you people would
have more room to rehearse.

463
00:23:21,666 --> 00:23:23,555
For which you're getting
a piece of the show.

464
00:23:23,611 --> 00:23:25,913
Don't argue with a peasant.
We're clearin' out today.

465
00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:27,680
The sooner, the better.

466
00:23:30,936 --> 00:23:33,065
Joe, suppose the sailors
don't come through?

467
00:23:33,131 --> 00:23:35,421
- They got to.
- Well, I almost wish they wouldn't.

468
00:23:35,688 --> 00:23:38,250
Then maybe you'd go back to being
an agent instead of a producer.

469
00:23:38,357 --> 00:23:40,719
All you seem to care about now
is getting the show on.

470
00:23:40,784 --> 00:23:43,522
Well, they gotta get on
before they can stay on.

471
00:23:43,751 --> 00:23:46,178
Don't worry, cookie.
Someday, we'll get a long run.

472
00:23:46,258 --> 00:23:49,418
Oh, we got one.
Our engagement is now in its third year.

473
00:23:49,484 --> 00:23:51,697
We'll get married
as soon as I get a hit.

474
00:23:55,854 --> 00:23:58,646
I wouldn't want a swell doll
like you to marry a failure.

475
00:23:58,764 --> 00:24:00,098
Oh, thanks.

476
00:24:05,304 --> 00:24:07,447
That's all for today, kids,
we're clearin' out.

477
00:24:07,593 --> 00:24:09,162
There's a fleet of trucks coming in.

478
00:24:09,702 --> 00:24:11,236
We goin' to the theater now, Mr. Woods?

479
00:24:11,290 --> 00:24:12,798
Oh, no. We're through rehearsin'.

480
00:24:12,918 --> 00:24:15,247
Well, here are the contracts.
Sign, and we're partners.

481
00:24:15,374 --> 00:24:16,775
Anybody got a fountain pen?

482
00:24:17,216 --> 00:24:19,965
You wouldn't want us to sign without
seeing or hearing the show, would you?

483
00:24:20,009 --> 00:24:20,866
Of course not!

484
00:24:20,908 --> 00:24:23,322
Miss Weston and I'll run through
the words and music for you.

485
00:24:23,543 --> 00:24:24,942
Mr. Woods!

486
00:24:25,135 --> 00:24:28,068
Are you suggesting that
the full potential of this project...

487
00:24:28,202 --> 00:24:31,502
...can be achieved
without my participation?

488
00:24:33,817 --> 00:24:35,320
Perish the thought, Mr. Rossi.

489
00:24:35,527 --> 00:24:38,419
You don't think Joe Woods
would allow a star of your magnitude

490
00:24:38,444 --> 00:24:39,751
to stoop to an audition?

491
00:24:39,811 --> 00:24:44,630
This, uh, sordid commercial bargaining
is beyond the great Emilio Rossi.

492
00:24:44,748 --> 00:24:45,824
Very well.

493
00:24:46,130 --> 00:24:47,815
I shall be at my hotel.

494
00:24:47,955 --> 00:24:51,055
Call me when you get a theater...
not a garage.

495
00:24:52,797 --> 00:24:55,447
Mr. Woods...
May I speak to you for a moment, please?

496
00:24:57,303 --> 00:24:58,630
What's the matter?

497
00:25:00,533 --> 00:25:02,415
You're gonna swindle
these boys, aren't you?

498
00:25:02,929 --> 00:25:04,971
If you mean,
am I gonna steal their money?

499
00:25:05,018 --> 00:25:06,478
- You're wrong.
- No...

500
00:25:06,545 --> 00:25:08,080
I mean you're not gonna
let them read the script

501
00:25:08,108 --> 00:25:09,935
because it isn't
what you told them it was.

502
00:25:10,369 --> 00:25:13,113
All you have to do is make the guy
with the moneybag like ya,

503
00:25:13,138 --> 00:25:14,273
I'll take care of the script.

504
00:25:14,489 --> 00:25:15,907
But I wanna be an actress.

505
00:25:16,022 --> 00:25:18,236
I don't wanna make people like me
just to get their money.

506
00:25:18,576 --> 00:25:21,379
Well, that's what every good actress
does to every audience.

507
00:25:21,754 --> 00:25:22,702
Honey...

508
00:25:22,927 --> 00:25:25,077
That whole company is depending on you.

509
00:25:26,461 --> 00:25:28,368
You wouldn't wanna
let them down, would you?

510
00:25:29,462 --> 00:25:31,958
Please make the guy
with the money like you.

511
00:25:35,807 --> 00:25:37,212
Honey...

512
00:25:38,236 --> 00:25:39,444
Thanks.

513
00:25:39,695 --> 00:25:41,440
I knew you'd come through.

514
00:25:43,301 --> 00:25:45,268
[tires screeching]

515
00:25:45,729 --> 00:25:48,129
Hang on a minute!

516
00:25:48,195 --> 00:25:50,522
Come on, get that stuff outta there.
Come on.

517
00:25:56,902 --> 00:25:58,096
Melvin, you look tired.

518
00:25:58,189 --> 00:26:00,172
Take the afternoon off,
I'll call you when I need you.

519
00:26:00,228 --> 00:26:02,394
I know why you wanna get rid of me.

520
00:26:02,494 --> 00:26:04,994
I heard the sailors say they think
the show's about the Navy.

521
00:26:05,124 --> 00:26:07,192
Don't worry,
I'll see they keep right on thinkin'...

522
00:26:07,261 --> 00:26:08,421
No, you won't.

523
00:26:08,588 --> 00:26:11,696
After they invest...
you'll make me re-write it again.

524
00:26:11,770 --> 00:26:13,892
Alright, a line here, a line there...

525
00:26:13,952 --> 00:26:18,650
Mr. Woods... I wrote a play about
my childhood, a tragedy.

526
00:26:18,877 --> 00:26:20,894
You turned it into a musical comedy.

527
00:26:20,961 --> 00:26:23,527
Then you started
changing scenes to get investors.

528
00:26:23,675 --> 00:26:26,485
Now, it's a revue.
No story, just scenes.

529
00:26:26,671 --> 00:26:29,975
We even have a scene in Shanghai
to pay off the man who does your laundry.

530
00:26:30,141 --> 00:26:32,725
Shanghai! That's it!

531
00:26:32,961 --> 00:26:33,939
That's it!

532
00:26:34,493 --> 00:26:37,349
Put some Navy stuff in the Shanghai sea.

533
00:26:37,495 --> 00:26:39,278
I knew you'd come up with somethin'.

534
00:26:47,432 --> 00:26:48,683
Oh, you play, huh?

535
00:26:48,950 --> 00:26:51,523
- Well, a little.
- And he chirps like a bird, too.

536
00:26:51,593 --> 00:26:52,438
I've been sick.

537
00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:56,354
Twitch here is the rhythm section.
Go ahead. Show her, Twitch.

538
00:26:56,514 --> 00:26:57,556
[piano music]

539
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:01,694
[tap dancing]

540
00:27:02,687 --> 00:27:04,827
(all) I tell you, it gives a man pause.

541
00:27:04,989 --> 00:27:06,051
[clapping]

542
00:27:06,094 --> 00:27:08,261
- From the top, huh, 'Boy?
- Well, alright.

543
00:27:11,216 --> 00:27:14,793
♪ In the true show business vernacular ♪

544
00:27:14,833 --> 00:27:15,901
♪ Hum ♪

545
00:27:15,941 --> 00:27:19,979
♪ I feel colossal, amazing,
spectacular ♪

546
00:27:20,065 --> 00:27:21,339
♪ Hum ♪

547
00:27:21,425 --> 00:27:25,837
♪ I would sure have a wonderful deal ♪

548
00:27:25,954 --> 00:27:30,550
♪ If I could copyright
the way that I feel ♪

549
00:27:30,761 --> 00:27:33,138
♪ The way the way that I feel ♪

550
00:27:33,244 --> 00:27:34,949
♪ Lately I just float ♪

551
00:27:34,973 --> 00:27:37,496
♪ Lately, just like in a trance ♪

552
00:27:37,537 --> 00:27:38,230
♪ Ooh-ooh ♪

553
00:27:38,263 --> 00:27:42,153
♪ I got butterflies, butterflies,
all of the time ♪

554
00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:43,868
(all) All the time?

555
00:27:43,930 --> 00:27:47,772
♪ And the feelin' I feel
is mighty close to sublime ♪

556
00:27:48,741 --> 00:27:49,794
♪ Sublime ♪

557
00:27:49,862 --> 00:27:52,596
♪ Lately I don't walk lately ♪

558
00:27:52,769 --> 00:27:54,846
♪ Lately I just dance ♪

559
00:27:55,100 --> 00:27:58,984
♪ I got butterflies, butterflies,
all the while ♪

560
00:27:59,009 --> 00:28:00,676
♪ All the while ♪

561
00:28:00,793 --> 00:28:04,259
♪ And they tickle me so
I constantly wear a smile ♪

562
00:28:04,643 --> 00:28:05,577
♪ That's nice ♪

563
00:28:05,631 --> 00:28:08,407
- ♪ Yesterday the sun ♪
- ♪ Yesterday the sun ♪

564
00:28:08,461 --> 00:28:11,117
- ♪ Couldn't get through to me ♪
- ♪ Couldn't get to me ♪

565
00:28:11,142 --> 00:28:14,034
- ♪ Now don't you misconstrue me ♪
- ♪ Don't you misconstrue me ♪

566
00:28:14,059 --> 00:28:16,255
- ♪ Sun was everywhere ♪
- Yeah!

567
00:28:16,348 --> 00:28:17,783
♪ I just didn't care, but... ♪

568
00:28:17,843 --> 00:28:20,559
♪ Lately how it shines lately ♪

569
00:28:20,645 --> 00:28:22,854
♪ Shines on our romance ♪

570
00:28:22,974 --> 00:28:25,510
- ♪ He's got butterflies ♪
- ♪ Butterflies ♪

571
00:28:25,591 --> 00:28:27,959
♪ What do they say ♪

572
00:28:28,761 --> 00:28:30,643
♪ They say we're in love ♪

573
00:28:30,739 --> 00:28:32,458
♪ We're in love to stay ♪

574
00:28:34,647 --> 00:28:37,080
[instrumental music]

575
00:29:03,679 --> 00:29:05,112
[music continues]

576
00:29:07,260 --> 00:29:10,476
[battery charger buzzing]

577
00:29:16,074 --> 00:29:20,294
[slow-paced music]

578
00:29:35,780 --> 00:29:37,428
I'm adorable!

579
00:29:41,799 --> 00:29:44,266
[music continues]

580
00:29:49,627 --> 00:29:51,361
[crashing]

581
00:29:52,694 --> 00:29:54,227
[instrumental music]

582
00:30:17,027 --> 00:30:21,508
♪ I just didn't care ♪

583
00:30:21,638 --> 00:30:24,509
♪ Lately how it shines lately ♪

584
00:30:24,589 --> 00:30:26,844
♪ Shines on our romance ♪

585
00:30:26,939 --> 00:30:29,501
♪ And those butterflies, butterflies ♪

586
00:30:29,561 --> 00:30:32,470
♪ What do they say? ♪

587
00:30:32,761 --> 00:30:35,954
♪ They say we're in love ♪

588
00:30:36,067 --> 00:30:38,874
♪ We're in love to... ♪

589
00:30:39,086 --> 00:30:40,286
Oh, no.

590
00:30:40,359 --> 00:30:41,300
[Twitch whistles]

591
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:43,740
[tapping]

592
00:31:03,961 --> 00:31:05,394
[tapping continues]

593
00:32:11,140 --> 00:32:12,751
♪ Yesterday the sun ♪

594
00:32:12,807 --> 00:32:16,034
♪ Yesterday the sun
couldn't get through to me ♪

595
00:32:17,069 --> 00:32:18,976
♪ My life was awful gloomy ♪

596
00:32:19,558 --> 00:32:23,408
♪ But not today 'cause
the ever-lovin' sun is here to stay ♪

597
00:32:23,487 --> 00:32:24,854
[engine sputtering]

598
00:32:26,394 --> 00:32:27,927
[music continues]

599
00:32:44,149 --> 00:32:46,071
♪ Wonder why ♪

600
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:48,894
♪ Why do they say ♪

601
00:32:49,933 --> 00:32:52,311
♪ They say we're in love ♪

602
00:32:52,894 --> 00:32:54,746
♪ We're in love ♪

603
00:32:54,813 --> 00:33:01,173
♪ To stay ♪

604
00:33:05,694 --> 00:33:06,891
[indistinct chattering]

605
00:33:06,933 --> 00:33:08,315
[all laughing]

606
00:33:10,669 --> 00:33:12,290
Gosh, Miss Weston, you're wonderful.

607
00:33:12,337 --> 00:33:13,867
Yeah, honey, I dig you the most.

608
00:33:13,925 --> 00:33:15,253
The show oughta be
a cinch with you in it.

609
00:33:15,278 --> 00:33:17,836
- You're pretty wonderful yourselves...
- I got your contracts right here.

610
00:33:19,469 --> 00:33:20,572
Not yet, Mr. Woods.

611
00:33:20,641 --> 00:33:22,941
Well, you like the number, didn't you?
You like Miss Weston.

612
00:33:23,002 --> 00:33:24,406
Yes, I like Miss Weston.

613
00:33:25,022 --> 00:33:26,457
But that's only one number.

614
00:33:26,521 --> 00:33:28,774
And Mr. Rossi's the star of the show,
and not Miss Weston.

615
00:33:29,041 --> 00:33:30,475
And where's the Navy stuff?

616
00:33:30,734 --> 00:33:31,896
In the scenes.

617
00:33:32,015 --> 00:33:33,885
Well, maybe we oughta read the scenes.

618
00:33:33,922 --> 00:33:35,065
I think maybe they'd better.

619
00:33:35,110 --> 00:33:37,715
Oh, sure, sure,
I'm dying to read 'em to ya.

620
00:33:37,747 --> 00:33:40,725
I'll tell you what... we'll have
a quiet little dinner someplace,

621
00:33:40,836 --> 00:33:42,569
and I'll read 'em to ya personally.

622
00:33:43,103 --> 00:33:44,969
[loud band music]

623
00:33:48,936 --> 00:33:50,369
[indistinct chattering]

624
00:34:02,569 --> 00:34:04,369
[music continues]

625
00:34:06,468 --> 00:34:07,802
[music stops]

626
00:34:07,868 --> 00:34:11,735
Rossi goes into a salute
and sings "Anchors Aweigh." Curtain.

627
00:34:12,378 --> 00:34:14,392
Will that scene fracture 'em?
You tell me.

628
00:34:14,646 --> 00:34:15,946
To tell you the truth...

629
00:34:16,661 --> 00:34:18,350
To tell you the truth,
I couldn't hear much of it.

630
00:34:18,405 --> 00:34:19,291
You couldn't?

631
00:34:19,805 --> 00:34:21,119
What I heard, I didn't dig.

632
00:34:21,346 --> 00:34:24,362
Of course not.
This stuff is deep, makes you think.

633
00:34:24,653 --> 00:34:25,726
Well, uh...

634
00:34:26,053 --> 00:34:27,866
I think I better read it.

635
00:34:35,487 --> 00:34:37,268
- What's the matter?
- Plenty, I need your help.

636
00:34:37,347 --> 00:34:37,922
My help?

637
00:34:37,947 --> 00:34:39,524
Yeah, you know I can't
let him read that script,

638
00:34:39,557 --> 00:34:41,066
or he'll know it's not about the Navy.

639
00:34:41,406 --> 00:34:42,408
But what can I do?

640
00:34:42,433 --> 00:34:45,003
Well, you could dance with him,
that'll keep his mind off of it.

641
00:34:45,093 --> 00:34:46,050
Go ahead.

642
00:34:46,481 --> 00:34:47,579
Go ahead!

643
00:34:50,569 --> 00:34:52,376
Isn't anyone gonna dance with little me?

644
00:34:52,487 --> 00:34:53,524
How 'bout little me?

645
00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:55,921
How do ya like that,
me talking business?

646
00:34:57,714 --> 00:35:00,845
What're you waiting for?
Dance, have fun, enjoy yourself.

647
00:35:00,941 --> 00:35:02,045
Live a little.

648
00:35:02,413 --> 00:35:03,455
Go, guys.

649
00:35:03,855 --> 00:35:05,230
She's goin' over
real big with me, y'know.

650
00:35:05,617 --> 00:35:08,312
I hope you don't mind
my holding out on the show like this.

651
00:35:08,467 --> 00:35:09,534
It's just that...

652
00:35:09,627 --> 00:35:12,616
Well, I have to be careful
how I invest the fellas' money.

653
00:35:13,081 --> 00:35:15,840
A man with resistance
is much more fascinating.

654
00:35:15,940 --> 00:35:17,162
[chuckling]

655
00:35:17,340 --> 00:35:20,005
Oh... I'm afraid I'm
not much of a dancer.

656
00:35:20,352 --> 00:35:21,752
I'm afraid you're right.

657
00:35:21,932 --> 00:35:23,842
Well, what do you know?
An honest woman.

658
00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:27,819
Any other girl would've said,
"You dance marvelously."

659
00:35:28,661 --> 00:35:29,894
You know something?

660
00:35:30,551 --> 00:35:32,224
I think you're wonderful.

661
00:35:34,219 --> 00:35:35,027
It's no use.

662
00:35:36,841 --> 00:35:38,764
Hey, am I that bad?

663
00:35:39,837 --> 00:35:42,985
Choirboy... I'm not an honest woman.

664
00:35:43,287 --> 00:35:45,984
I was sent here to vamp you
into backing Mr. Woods' show.

665
00:35:46,357 --> 00:35:48,113
Shucks, I know that!

666
00:35:50,554 --> 00:35:51,450
You do?

667
00:35:51,716 --> 00:35:55,159
Why else would a star like you spend
an evening with three mugs like us?

668
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:59,223
Choirboy, I'm not a star.
I'm just Emilio Rossi's leading lady.

669
00:35:59,417 --> 00:36:00,952
Which makes me practically anonymous.

670
00:36:01,019 --> 00:36:02,414
Well, to me you're a star.

671
00:36:02,895 --> 00:36:04,261
And if I back this show,

672
00:36:04,335 --> 00:36:07,145
it'll be because I wanna prove
to everybody else how great you are.

673
00:36:07,218 --> 00:36:08,534
That money belongs to your shipmates,

674
00:36:09,047 --> 00:36:11,383
and I just couldn't bear
the responsibility of it.

675
00:36:11,689 --> 00:36:14,339
Alright... suppose you talked us
out of backin' the show,

676
00:36:14,413 --> 00:36:15,627
and it was a hit.

677
00:36:15,889 --> 00:36:17,362
You'd really feel bad, wouldn't you?

678
00:36:19,206 --> 00:36:21,413
- Yes.
- Well, there you are.

679
00:36:22,286 --> 00:36:25,490
Look... what do you say
we drink to a big success?

680
00:36:26,098 --> 00:36:28,980
[guests applauding]

681
00:36:29,948 --> 00:36:32,750
- Pardon me!
- I'm sorry, but this is our table.

682
00:36:32,828 --> 00:36:34,692
And our champagne.

683
00:36:35,321 --> 00:36:37,442
[chuckling]

684
00:36:37,582 --> 00:36:40,384
Well, so...
So... so it is.

685
00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:43,674
Excuse us, please.

686
00:36:44,248 --> 00:36:46,915
- Shall we dance?
- I think we'd better.

687
00:36:47,204 --> 00:36:48,667
Have you ever in your life...

688
00:36:52,818 --> 00:36:56,281
♪ There must be a reason ♪

689
00:36:56,641 --> 00:37:00,751
♪ Why I look at you and sigh ♪

690
00:37:00,948 --> 00:37:03,675
♪ There are many, I suppose ♪

691
00:37:04,015 --> 00:37:08,015
♪ But somehow those I think of ♪

692
00:37:08,074 --> 00:37:11,163
♪ Just don't apply ♪

693
00:37:11,663 --> 00:37:14,181
♪ There must be a reason ♪

694
00:37:14,298 --> 00:37:18,196
♪ For that something in your kiss ♪

695
00:37:19,050 --> 00:37:22,481
♪ 'Cause I've been kissed before ♪

696
00:37:22,746 --> 00:37:27,438
♪ But never quite like this ♪

697
00:37:28,472 --> 00:37:31,960
♪ There must be an answer ♪

698
00:37:32,229 --> 00:37:36,107
♪ One that any fool could see ♪

699
00:37:36,755 --> 00:37:39,531
♪ I could almost give you ten ♪

700
00:37:39,991 --> 00:37:43,241
♪ But never when you're dancing ♪

701
00:37:43,328 --> 00:37:46,948
♪ So close to me ♪

702
00:37:47,015 --> 00:37:50,855
♪ If I should ask a wise man ♪

703
00:37:51,489 --> 00:37:55,815
♪ To explain why
I thrill to your charms ♪

704
00:37:56,174 --> 00:37:59,841
♪ He would say, "You're in love" ♪

705
00:38:00,091 --> 00:38:04,542
♪ "And the reason's right there in..." ♪

706
00:38:04,929 --> 00:38:09,888
♪ "...your arms" ♪

707
00:38:14,306 --> 00:38:17,548
♪ There must be an answer ♪

708
00:38:17,729 --> 00:38:21,987
- ♪ One that any fool could see ♪
- ♪ La-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪

709
00:38:22,079 --> 00:38:24,488
♪ I could almost give you ten ♪

710
00:38:25,088 --> 00:38:28,221
♪ But never when you're dancing ♪

711
00:38:28,286 --> 00:38:31,515
♪ So close to me ♪

712
00:38:31,581 --> 00:38:35,386
♪ If I should ask a wise man ♪

713
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:42,854
♪ To explain why I
thrill to your charms ♪

714
00:38:43,094 --> 00:38:48,881
♪ He would say we're in love ♪

715
00:38:49,127 --> 00:38:52,490
♪ And the reason's right here ♪

716
00:38:52,549 --> 00:39:03,314
♪ In your arms ♪

717
00:39:04,793 --> 00:39:07,549
[crowd applauding]

718
00:39:08,134 --> 00:39:10,488
Hey, aren't you
taking too much for granted?

719
00:39:13,245 --> 00:39:15,900
What do you think... partner?

720
00:39:16,241 --> 00:39:21,174
[applause continues]

721
00:39:21,848 --> 00:39:23,781
[indistinct chattering]

722
00:39:28,081 --> 00:39:31,189
[fog horn blaring]

723
00:39:35,415 --> 00:39:37,254
- Watch your step.
- Thanks.

724
00:39:37,441 --> 00:39:38,796
Gee, I wouldn't wanna
get you fellas in trouble,

725
00:39:38,821 --> 00:39:39,981
bringing a woman on board.

726
00:39:40,027 --> 00:39:42,314
- Oh, come on, Penny, it's okay.
- Oh, sure.

727
00:39:42,647 --> 00:39:46,191
Hey... I see where US Steel
went up half a point.

728
00:39:46,281 --> 00:39:47,925
Gee, I hope Choirboy got on that one.

729
00:39:48,215 --> 00:39:50,068
Continental Soybeans dropped four cents!

730
00:39:50,227 --> 00:39:52,663
Now, what sailor would buy beans?

731
00:39:52,964 --> 00:39:54,799
This waiting is killing me.

732
00:39:55,153 --> 00:39:57,448
Choirboy should've
been back here hours ago.

733
00:39:57,609 --> 00:39:59,571
Yeah, wonder what's keeping
that guy ashore.

734
00:39:59,865 --> 00:40:01,628
After eight months at sea...

735
00:40:01,965 --> 00:40:03,922
...I'll draw you a picture.

736
00:40:11,970 --> 00:40:15,413
It's been so long,
I'm beginning to see them everywhere.

737
00:40:16,227 --> 00:40:18,617
Are you sure this is alright?
What'll the captain say?

738
00:40:18,722 --> 00:40:19,688
Who's gonna tell him?

739
00:40:19,781 --> 00:40:21,187
[all laughing]

740
00:40:21,448 --> 00:40:23,415
[whistling]

741
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:28,106
Thank you very much.

742
00:40:29,834 --> 00:40:31,615
- Hiya, boys.
- Hi.

743
00:40:31,910 --> 00:40:33,648
Hi! Man, what do you say, huh?

744
00:40:33,841 --> 00:40:35,954
- Hey, come on, Pork. Watch it.
- Easy...

745
00:40:38,229 --> 00:40:39,404
This thing must be shrinkin'!

746
00:40:40,585 --> 00:40:42,320
We were just wonderin'
what happened to you.

747
00:40:42,779 --> 00:40:45,515
- Now we know.
- Now, don't jump to conclusions.

748
00:40:45,709 --> 00:40:49,520
Fellas... this is Miss Penny Weston,
who is now working for us.

749
00:40:49,607 --> 00:40:51,509
- Yeah, she's in your show.
- Show?

750
00:40:51,555 --> 00:40:52,950
- What show?
- Our show?

751
00:40:53,384 --> 00:40:54,545
What is this?

752
00:40:54,678 --> 00:40:57,381
Well... we ended up on Broadway
instead of Wall Street.

753
00:40:57,448 --> 00:40:59,497
Yeah, you know how you can
get lost in a strange town.

754
00:40:59,570 --> 00:41:01,251
You put our money in a show?

755
00:41:01,345 --> 00:41:03,581
Not <i>a</i> show, <i>the</i> show, stupid.

756
00:41:03,675 --> 00:41:05,222
Starring Emilio Rossi.

757
00:41:05,276 --> 00:41:07,115
I tell you, fellas,
it's a great investment.

758
00:41:07,175 --> 00:41:09,488
Well, wait'll you hear what
"South Pacific" did, and "Oklahoma!"

759
00:41:09,513 --> 00:41:11,697
And Wisconsin, and Michigan,
and Texas AandM...

760
00:41:11,779 --> 00:41:14,305
- What's ours done?
- It's gonna be a great hit.

761
00:41:14,478 --> 00:41:15,567
It's all about the navy.

762
00:41:15,651 --> 00:41:18,149
- Well, I don't wanna back a show!
- Yeah, where's the money?

763
00:41:18,176 --> 00:41:19,490
Are you tryin' to pull a fast one?

764
00:41:19,528 --> 00:41:21,745
- What's the big idea...
- Wait a minute, fellas.

765
00:41:21,803 --> 00:41:23,661
Why don't you wait
until you see the show?

766
00:41:23,717 --> 00:41:25,803
$50,000 to see a show!

767
00:41:25,903 --> 00:41:26,964
Why, you...

768
00:41:27,624 --> 00:41:29,557
Wait a minute, fellas, wait a minute!

769
00:41:29,642 --> 00:41:31,350
Hey, Penny, sing somethin'!

770
00:41:31,456 --> 00:41:32,524
But what shall I sing?

771
00:41:32,697 --> 00:41:34,831
- Sing anything!
- Anything!

772
00:41:44,242 --> 00:41:48,312
♪ When it's love ♪

773
00:41:48,384 --> 00:41:50,827
♪ You will know ♪

774
00:41:50,950 --> 00:41:54,845
♪ Not before, not until, not again ♪

775
00:41:54,996 --> 00:41:58,969
♪ When it's love, there's a glow ♪

776
00:41:59,036 --> 00:42:03,120
♪ That you've only suspected till then ♪

777
00:42:03,230 --> 00:42:07,784
♪ There's no thrill that you feel ♪

778
00:42:07,889 --> 00:42:11,589
♪ From a touch, from a glance,
from a sigh ♪

779
00:42:11,683 --> 00:42:15,941
♪ When it's love, and it's real ♪

780
00:42:16,030 --> 00:42:20,605
♪ You will know when,
you'll also know why ♪

781
00:42:23,143 --> 00:42:27,077
♪ Don't ever give up your dream ♪

782
00:42:27,189 --> 00:42:30,875
♪ Someday they'll all come true ♪

783
00:42:31,270 --> 00:42:35,566
♪ Somewhere there's someone
who's waiting to find ♪

784
00:42:35,636 --> 00:42:39,370
♪ Life's happiness with you ♪

785
00:42:39,591 --> 00:42:44,028
♪ When it's love ♪

786
00:42:44,090 --> 00:42:46,490
♪ You will know ♪

787
00:42:46,663 --> 00:42:49,097
♪ Not before, not until ♪

788
00:42:49,122 --> 00:42:50,201
♪ Not again ♪

789
00:42:50,797 --> 00:42:52,897
♪ When it's love ♪

790
00:42:52,922 --> 00:42:54,988
♪ There's a glow ♪

791
00:42:55,088 --> 00:42:59,344
♪ That you've only suspected till then ♪

792
00:43:00,663 --> 00:43:06,363
♪ There's no thrill that you feel ♪

793
00:43:06,483 --> 00:43:10,054
♪ From a touch, from a glance,
from a sigh ♪

794
00:43:10,397 --> 00:43:12,516
♪ When it's love ♪

795
00:43:12,609 --> 00:43:16,020
♪ And it's real ♪

796
00:43:16,083 --> 00:43:22,039
♪ You will always know why ♪

797
00:43:43,971 --> 00:43:46,904
[applauding]

798
00:43:50,984 --> 00:43:53,084
[piano music]

799
00:43:53,443 --> 00:43:57,889
♪ When it's love ♪

800
00:43:58,063 --> 00:43:59,897
♪ You will know ♪

801
00:44:00,044 --> 00:44:04,668
♪ Not before, not until, not again ♪

802
00:44:04,936 --> 00:44:10,047
♪ When it's love... ♪

803
00:44:10,756 --> 00:44:14,385
Ah, the acoustics in this theater
are impossible.

804
00:44:14,523 --> 00:44:15,833
That's all for today.

805
00:44:15,914 --> 00:44:19,070
Mr. Rossi, you can't break now.
What about the rest of the show?

806
00:44:19,139 --> 00:44:22,153
I am quite satisfied with my
performance throughout, Miss Weston.

807
00:44:22,185 --> 00:44:23,321
But our duets?

808
00:44:23,427 --> 00:44:26,137
Come to think of it, you are a bit off.

809
00:44:26,267 --> 00:44:28,212
I suggest you stay and work on them.

810
00:44:28,614 --> 00:44:31,481
[indistinct shouting]

811
00:44:35,720 --> 00:44:36,808
Hiya, Penny.

812
00:44:37,769 --> 00:44:39,323
- Costumes.
- Hi, Penny.

813
00:44:39,534 --> 00:44:41,252
- Props.
- Hi, Penny.

814
00:44:41,599 --> 00:44:42,474
Signs.

815
00:44:43,034 --> 00:44:44,034
Say...

816
00:44:44,189 --> 00:44:46,584
Do associate producers
always do this kinda work?

817
00:44:46,870 --> 00:44:48,692
Mr. Woods is really
keepin' us jumpin', you know.

818
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:50,620
Yeah, we're learnin' the biz
from the ground up.

819
00:44:51,014 --> 00:44:52,614
Hey, what's going on around here?

820
00:44:52,681 --> 00:44:55,314
Oh, nothing.
Mr. Rossi just dismissed the company.

821
00:44:55,399 --> 00:44:56,781
Great! Let's all have dinner.

822
00:44:56,854 --> 00:44:58,348
Anybody know a good place to over-eat?

823
00:44:58,481 --> 00:45:02,153
I'd love it, but Mr. Rossi seems to feel
that my duets need much more rehearsal.

824
00:45:02,514 --> 00:45:04,847
Well, you can't do that
without a partner.

825
00:45:05,002 --> 00:45:08,547
You suppose that I might
double for the Great Rossi?

826
00:45:08,686 --> 00:45:10,541
You'll probably spoil me.

827
00:45:10,813 --> 00:45:11,821
Well...

828
00:45:12,257 --> 00:45:13,556
So long, fellas.

829
00:45:13,611 --> 00:45:15,433
- Oh?
- Hmm!

830
00:45:16,220 --> 00:45:18,589
Well, Porky, it looks like
we should've been singers.

831
00:45:20,758 --> 00:45:21,819
You know this one?

832
00:45:23,020 --> 00:45:24,882
Well, I heard it a couple of times.

833
00:45:25,213 --> 00:45:27,418
You know I haven't
seen a rehearsal since?

834
00:45:28,727 --> 00:45:30,229
Sometimes I think Mr. Woods is

835
00:45:30,254 --> 00:45:32,182
keepin' me out of
the theater on purpose.

836
00:45:32,547 --> 00:45:35,099
- Why would he?
- I don't know.

837
00:45:35,933 --> 00:45:37,000
Look, Penny...

838
00:45:37,413 --> 00:45:40,698
I know that you wouldn't have anything
to do with anybody that's not okay.

839
00:45:41,586 --> 00:45:44,920
But lately I've heard a lot of
strange things about Joe Woods.

840
00:45:45,055 --> 00:45:46,677
Now, listen here, Choirboy.

841
00:45:46,824 --> 00:45:48,059
If the show is a hit,

842
00:45:48,139 --> 00:45:50,815
he'll be a hero to everyone,
no matter what he's done.

843
00:45:51,186 --> 00:45:52,877
This is a very crazy business.

844
00:45:53,503 --> 00:45:54,400
Yeah.

845
00:45:54,899 --> 00:45:57,522
And you're very crazy about
this crazy business, aren't you?

846
00:45:58,213 --> 00:46:00,051
Hmm, you have to be
a little bit, I guess.

847
00:46:00,500 --> 00:46:03,007
Well, maybe someday
I'll feel the same way about it.

848
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:06,234
But... I can only go crazy
about one thing at a time.

849
00:46:06,831 --> 00:46:07,925
And right now, when we're alone...

850
00:46:07,970 --> 00:46:09,634
(male
Hit those spots for rehearsal.

851
00:46:09,696 --> 00:46:11,975
- Uh-oh.
- Mmm, but we're not alone.

852
00:46:12,071 --> 00:46:14,325
(Penny) And you promised to
rehearse with me, remember?

853
00:46:14,824 --> 00:46:16,207
(Choirboy) So I did.

854
00:46:23,050 --> 00:46:26,797
♪ My heart ♪

855
00:46:26,918 --> 00:46:30,635
♪ Is a singing heart ♪

856
00:46:30,771 --> 00:46:36,400
♪ And love is the theme of its song ♪

857
00:46:37,610 --> 00:46:43,310
♪ The song didn't seem to start ♪

858
00:46:43,438 --> 00:46:46,638
♪ Until that happy time ♪

859
00:46:46,764 --> 00:46:50,968
♪ You came along ♪

860
00:46:51,056 --> 00:46:53,698
♪ My heart ♪

861
00:46:53,957 --> 00:46:57,782
♪ Was a pensive heart ♪

862
00:46:57,945 --> 00:47:04,482
♪ The songs that it sang were so few ♪

863
00:47:04,657 --> 00:47:08,257
♪ But now it just keeps singing ♪

864
00:47:08,350 --> 00:47:14,702
♪ It sings the whole day through ♪

865
00:47:14,857 --> 00:47:20,791
♪ And the song it keeps singing ♪

866
00:47:20,912 --> 00:47:24,846
♪ Is you ♪

867
00:47:27,152 --> 00:47:30,085
[instrumental music]

868
00:47:38,423 --> 00:47:42,854
- ♪ My heart ♪
- ♪ Always yearning to sing ♪

869
00:47:42,968 --> 00:47:47,698
- ♪ Was a pensive heart ♪
- ♪ It never knew spring ♪

870
00:47:47,772 --> 00:47:52,603
♪ And the songs that it sang ♪

871
00:47:52,716 --> 00:47:54,249
♪ Were so few ♪

872
00:47:54,291 --> 00:48:01,813
♪ Till the day when you came in view ♪

873
00:48:02,789 --> 00:48:06,864
♪ But now it just keeps singing ♪

874
00:48:09,470 --> 00:48:15,770
♪ It sings the whole day through ♪

875
00:48:16,490 --> 00:48:23,426
♪ And the song it keeps singing ♪

876
00:48:23,607 --> 00:48:30,594
♪ Is you ♪

877
00:48:44,470 --> 00:48:47,403
[piano music]

878
00:48:51,276 --> 00:48:53,524
(male
Mr. Rossi's rehearsing.

879
00:48:54,196 --> 00:48:57,822
Reginald! I've waited hours
for this moment.

880
00:48:59,083 --> 00:49:00,231
Uh..

881
00:49:00,724 --> 00:49:03,290
Umm..

882
00:49:03,357 --> 00:49:04,490
Uh..

883
00:49:04,598 --> 00:49:06,323
"Good evening, my dear."

884
00:49:06,690 --> 00:49:09,805
Oh, yes. Yes, yes.
"Good evening, my dear."

885
00:49:09,925 --> 00:49:11,682
Good evening, my dear.

886
00:49:12,116 --> 00:49:14,144
Good evening, my dear.

887
00:49:14,382 --> 00:49:18,440
Can't seem to remember that line,
"Good evening, my dear."

888
00:49:18,768 --> 00:49:20,602
Well, I have it now.

889
00:49:20,808 --> 00:49:22,940
I shall try my entrance again.

890
00:49:25,743 --> 00:49:28,143
- What's Porky doin' up there?
- Prompting.

891
00:49:28,592 --> 00:49:29,987
Prompting? In the middle of the stage?

892
00:49:30,279 --> 00:49:31,402
Rossi insists on it.

893
00:49:31,645 --> 00:49:33,437
That's the way they do it
in the opera.

894
00:49:35,139 --> 00:49:36,606
In the opera, they got the prompter

895
00:49:36,638 --> 00:49:38,962
hidden from the audience
in a silly little box.

896
00:49:39,046 --> 00:49:41,839
If we build one for him,
nobody'll see the show.

897
00:49:42,706 --> 00:49:46,406
Reginald! I've waited hours
for this moment.

898
00:49:48,834 --> 00:49:49,666
Uh..

899
00:49:50,067 --> 00:49:51,748
"Good evening, my dear."

900
00:49:52,139 --> 00:49:53,672
That settles it.

901
00:49:53,740 --> 00:49:56,053
When Rossi has trouble with a scene,

902
00:49:56,186 --> 00:49:59,357
it is never Rossi, it is the scene!

903
00:50:00,111 --> 00:50:01,091
(Rossi) Mr. Woods...

904
00:50:01,300 --> 00:50:04,295
I demand you take this scene
out of the show.

905
00:50:04,606 --> 00:50:06,236
It is impossible!

906
00:50:06,579 --> 00:50:09,762
The scene is not impossible.
But his acting is.

907
00:50:09,826 --> 00:50:11,715
Relax, Melvin, relax.

908
00:50:11,899 --> 00:50:12,962
Mr. Rossi...

909
00:50:13,471 --> 00:50:16,320
If you can't say,
"Good evening, my dear",

910
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:17,828
say, "Good morning, my dear."

911
00:50:17,879 --> 00:50:20,731
It's a short comedy scene.
After that comes the number.

912
00:50:21,020 --> 00:50:23,042
I also do not like the number.

913
00:50:23,290 --> 00:50:24,266
Take it out!

914
00:50:26,837 --> 00:50:28,170
Uh, Mr. Rossi...

915
00:50:28,237 --> 00:50:30,354
I've been watching ya,
and I think the whole trouble is

916
00:50:30,379 --> 00:50:32,189
you're playing this whole thing
too straight.

917
00:50:32,310 --> 00:50:34,826
Indeed?

918
00:50:35,209 --> 00:50:39,116
Well, perhaps <i>you</i>
can show me how to do it.

919
00:50:40,070 --> 00:50:41,413
Don't mind if I do, matey.

920
00:50:41,476 --> 00:50:43,409
[instrumental music]

921
00:50:45,330 --> 00:50:46,330
Pardon me.

922
00:50:46,410 --> 00:50:47,524
Penny!

923
00:50:47,778 --> 00:50:48,665
Yes?

924
00:50:48,969 --> 00:50:50,414
Will you be my guest?

925
00:50:52,843 --> 00:50:54,043
(Rossi) Set the stage!

926
00:50:55,856 --> 00:50:58,789
[music continues]

927
00:51:05,397 --> 00:51:08,565
♪ Love is the essence of ♪

928
00:51:08,656 --> 00:51:12,223
♪ The very quintessence of ♪

929
00:51:12,410 --> 00:51:15,337
♪ All that is pure ♪

930
00:51:15,410 --> 00:51:17,414
♪ And divine ♪

931
00:51:17,481 --> 00:51:18,929
Did you dig that line?

932
00:51:19,763 --> 00:51:21,392
♪ You can wrack your brain ♪

933
00:51:21,858 --> 00:51:23,373
♪ So she won't complain ♪

934
00:51:23,827 --> 00:51:26,243
♪ You can do the very best you can ♪

935
00:51:28,130 --> 00:51:30,560
♪ Show me a happy woman ♪

936
00:51:30,997 --> 00:51:34,765
♪ And I'll show you a miserable man ♪

937
00:51:35,530 --> 00:51:37,114
♪ You can buy her things ♪

938
00:51:37,408 --> 00:51:39,063
♪ Things like diamond rings ♪

939
00:51:39,556 --> 00:51:41,852
♪ Chauffeur her around in a sedan ♪

940
00:51:43,721 --> 00:51:46,116
♪ Show me a happy woman ♪

941
00:51:46,575 --> 00:51:49,353
♪ And I'll show you a miserable man ♪

942
00:51:49,453 --> 00:51:53,290
♪ That's the way it is ♪

943
00:51:53,349 --> 00:51:56,273
♪ Although-though-though
that's the way that it is ♪

944
00:51:57,929 --> 00:52:01,038
♪ All the merchandise is hers ♪

945
00:52:01,123 --> 00:52:04,608
♪ But the bills are his ♪

946
00:52:05,056 --> 00:52:08,456
♪ A thing like this can kill you,
just believe me, pal ♪

947
00:52:08,597 --> 00:52:10,434
♪ Any gal's a gal ♪

948
00:52:10,504 --> 00:52:14,544
♪ Oh, we're the same
from here to Hindustan ♪

949
00:52:14,905 --> 00:52:17,314
♪ Show me a happy woman ♪

950
00:52:17,764 --> 00:52:21,164
♪ And I'll show you a miserable man ♪

951
00:52:21,390 --> 00:52:24,323
[music continues]

952
00:52:28,632 --> 00:52:32,496
- ♪ They'll break your heart ♪
- ♪ But it's a lot of fun ♪

953
00:52:32,548 --> 00:52:34,636
♪ You're dead before you start ♪

954
00:52:35,178 --> 00:52:36,440
Poison, anyone?

955
00:52:36,555 --> 00:52:39,876
♪ A thing like this can kill us all,
believe me, pal ♪

956
00:52:39,923 --> 00:52:41,390
♪ Any gal's a gal ♪

957
00:52:41,852 --> 00:52:44,262
♪ Oh, we're the same
from here to Hindustan ♪

958
00:52:46,189 --> 00:52:48,259
♪ Show me a happy woman ♪

959
00:52:49,272 --> 00:52:52,963
♪ And I'll show you a miserable man ♪

960
00:52:53,063 --> 00:52:56,440
♪ All fallin' away to nothin' ♪

961
00:52:56,569 --> 00:52:59,310
♪ My miserable ♪

962
00:52:59,424 --> 00:53:00,430
Man?

963
00:53:00,549 --> 00:53:06,849
♪ Man ♪

964
00:53:08,030 --> 00:53:09,597
[audience applauding]

965
00:53:09,746 --> 00:53:11,762
There, you see?

966
00:53:12,023 --> 00:53:15,765
If the number is good for an amateur,
how could it be good for Rossi?

967
00:53:15,989 --> 00:53:17,063
Take it out.

968
00:53:17,261 --> 00:53:18,596
(Rossi) Take it out!

969
00:53:18,877 --> 00:53:20,484
Gee, Penny, I'm sorry.

970
00:53:20,678 --> 00:53:23,080
I didn't want him to take out
another one of your numbers.

971
00:53:23,263 --> 00:53:24,488
Thanks, Porky.

972
00:53:24,847 --> 00:53:26,157
At least he can't take out any more,

973
00:53:26,204 --> 00:53:28,057
it's our last rehearsal
before we open in Boston.

974
00:53:28,116 --> 00:53:31,049
[instrumental music]

975
00:53:41,630 --> 00:53:43,564
[piano music]

976
00:53:44,910 --> 00:53:47,005
♪ Lately I just felt

977
00:53:47,077 --> 00:53:50,027
♪ Lately just like in a trance

978
00:53:50,307 --> 00:53:51,828
♪ He's got bored of life

979
00:53:51,903 --> 00:53:54,305
♪ Bored of life all the time ♪

980
00:53:56,171 --> 00:53:58,175
♪ And they tickled him so he can't ♪

981
00:53:58,200 --> 00:54:00,050
[indistinct shouting]

982
00:54:02,364 --> 00:54:03,760
[crowd applauding]

983
00:54:03,829 --> 00:54:05,803
Come on, Melvin, join the fun.

984
00:54:05,869 --> 00:54:07,049
A couple hours from now,

985
00:54:07,073 --> 00:54:10,948
the entire audience'll be on its feet,
yelling "Author! Author!"

986
00:54:11,875 --> 00:54:13,497
That's what I've been worrying about.

987
00:54:13,603 --> 00:54:15,391
Depends on <i>how</i> they yell it.

988
00:54:15,819 --> 00:54:17,788
I hear these Boston audiences are tough.

989
00:54:18,043 --> 00:54:20,644
Melvin... it's gonna be a big hit.

990
00:54:20,751 --> 00:54:22,673
It's gonna be a big hit.

991
00:54:23,046 --> 00:54:25,395
Frankly, when Joe first thought of
starring you in the musical,

992
00:54:25,456 --> 00:54:27,331
- I said he was a jerk.
- Genius.

993
00:54:27,423 --> 00:54:29,532
And tonight the whole world
will agree with you.

994
00:54:29,706 --> 00:54:31,474
When that curtain goes up
an hour from now,

995
00:54:31,499 --> 00:54:35,145
the name of Emilio Rossi will go down
in history with the Boston Tea Party.

996
00:54:35,203 --> 00:54:36,770
Didn't that start a war?

997
00:54:36,932 --> 00:54:38,648
- Well, I...
- Not a word.

998
00:54:38,901 --> 00:54:41,538
I want you to save every one
of those bell-like tones

999
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:42,992
for the performance.

1000
00:54:45,937 --> 00:54:48,826
- Man, this is livin'.
- Hey, where's Choirboy?

1001
00:54:50,376 --> 00:54:52,310
Here. Wash it down with this.

1002
00:54:54,084 --> 00:54:57,167
- Hiya, Mr. Woods.
- Hey, hey, hey, get a load of you!

1003
00:54:57,273 --> 00:54:59,035
Well, I... I thought it was customary.

1004
00:54:59,102 --> 00:55:00,824
- How do I look?
- Just like a producer.

1005
00:55:00,870 --> 00:55:03,470
You got an instinct for this business.
It's uncanny.

1006
00:55:03,988 --> 00:55:04,942
Aren't you gonna get dressed?

1007
00:55:04,994 --> 00:55:07,039
No, I'm lettin' you
take the bows tonight.

1008
00:55:07,102 --> 00:55:08,344
But don't take too many.

1009
00:55:08,455 --> 00:55:10,227
Right after the show,
we're gonna have a conference.

1010
00:55:10,300 --> 00:55:11,441
Oh? What for?

1011
00:55:11,508 --> 00:55:14,384
After an out of town opening,
there's always conferences.

1012
00:55:14,454 --> 00:55:16,200
It figures. You know, changes.

1013
00:55:16,327 --> 00:55:18,809
Maybe a line, or a piece of business.

1014
00:55:19,041 --> 00:55:21,164
You mean you might let me
make a couple of suggestions?

1015
00:55:21,198 --> 00:55:21,806
Sure.

1016
00:55:22,079 --> 00:55:24,961
I want you to take a pencil
and a piece of paper to the theater,

1017
00:55:25,001 --> 00:55:26,890
and write down everything
you don't like.

1018
00:55:26,981 --> 00:55:27,836
May I come in?

1019
00:55:27,860 --> 00:55:30,093
- Hiya, Penny.
- Come in, come in!

1020
00:55:30,148 --> 00:55:33,608
This is a big night for you kids,
you oughta have a moment alone.

1021
00:55:33,733 --> 00:55:36,486
Thanks a lot.
We'll see you later, Mr. Woods.

1022
00:55:36,987 --> 00:55:40,120
- Well... how do I look?
- Ah, you look wonderful.

1023
00:55:40,368 --> 00:55:42,378
I had to wish you luck
before I went to the theater.

1024
00:55:42,447 --> 00:55:44,180
After all, it's your very first show.

1025
00:55:44,408 --> 00:55:46,957
Shucks.
You're all the luck I need.

1026
00:55:47,714 --> 00:55:48,478
Choirboy...

1027
00:55:48,532 --> 00:55:51,234
Sometimes shows don't turn out
the way you expect them to.

1028
00:55:51,420 --> 00:55:53,320
Well, I know that.

1029
00:55:53,608 --> 00:55:55,832
But I'm gonna make notes
for the conference.

1030
00:55:56,187 --> 00:55:58,488
Don't you think it's a little late
for making notes?

1031
00:55:58,605 --> 00:56:02,265
Well, you know, a line here or there,
maybe some extra business.

1032
00:56:02,787 --> 00:56:05,816
We producers always have a conference
after an out-of-town opening.

1033
00:56:06,007 --> 00:56:07,892
It, uh... it figures.

1034
00:56:08,700 --> 00:56:11,989
I hate to think of the show being
anything but a great success.

1035
00:56:12,078 --> 00:56:14,031
With you in it, it can't miss.

1036
00:56:15,779 --> 00:56:17,481
But suppose it does.

1037
00:56:17,632 --> 00:56:20,665
Hey... I think you have a case of
opening night jitters.

1038
00:56:20,927 --> 00:56:23,460
I heard all about that.
It's good for actors.

1039
00:56:23,572 --> 00:56:24,581
Keeps 'em on their toes.

1040
00:56:24,993 --> 00:56:27,831
Hey, Penny, come on,
don't be downhearted.

1041
00:56:27,886 --> 00:56:30,093
Cheer up.
We've got a hit on our hands.

1042
00:56:30,392 --> 00:56:31,588
I hope so.

1043
00:56:32,399 --> 00:56:33,484
Not now, huh?

1044
00:56:35,459 --> 00:56:36,560
Why not?

1045
00:56:37,312 --> 00:56:39,170
It's bad luck to kiss on opening night.

1046
00:56:40,993 --> 00:56:43,226
Kissing you couldn't be
anybody's bad luck.

1047
00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:47,424
But you might not feel the same
about me after the show.

1048
00:56:48,220 --> 00:56:49,866
You might hate me.

1049
00:56:51,412 --> 00:56:52,849
Hate you?

1050
00:56:54,405 --> 00:56:57,339
Do you mind if I break
an old show business tradition?

1051
00:57:00,865 --> 00:57:03,726
Hey, Choirboy, you can't keep
the leading lady here all night.

1052
00:57:03,793 --> 00:57:05,088
Come on, let's go.

1053
00:57:05,696 --> 00:57:06,843
Well, this is it.

1054
00:57:07,212 --> 00:57:10,060
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1055
00:57:10,142 --> 00:57:13,356
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1056
00:57:13,422 --> 00:57:16,553
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1057
00:57:16,643 --> 00:57:19,836
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1058
00:57:19,910 --> 00:57:23,347
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1059
00:57:23,409 --> 00:57:26,856
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1060
00:57:27,104 --> 00:57:30,527
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1061
00:57:30,690 --> 00:57:34,231
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1062
00:57:34,296 --> 00:57:37,796
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1063
00:57:37,896 --> 00:57:41,345
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1064
00:57:41,422 --> 00:57:44,802
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1065
00:57:44,870 --> 00:57:48,144
♪ It's gonna be a big hit,
it's gonna be a big hit ♪

1066
00:57:48,590 --> 00:57:50,590
[instrumental music]

1067
00:58:00,822 --> 00:58:03,322
[music continues]

1068
00:58:17,707 --> 00:58:20,370
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Get down from there!

1069
00:58:20,670 --> 00:58:21,971
What do you think you're doin'?

1070
00:58:22,036 --> 00:58:24,902
- Why didn't you let me jump?
- Don't be silly, look at us.

1071
00:58:24,970 --> 00:58:27,284
We've each got over a thousand dollars
of our own money in it.

1072
00:58:27,350 --> 00:58:28,821
After you, gentlemen.

1073
00:58:28,917 --> 00:58:30,317
Thanks, but no thanks.

1074
00:58:31,022 --> 00:58:34,064
- They didn't like it, did they?
- They hated it!

1075
00:58:34,741 --> 00:58:38,041
You know, Twitch, when I saw him do
little bits of the show in rehearsal,

1076
00:58:38,115 --> 00:58:39,282
I thought it was kinda weak.

1077
00:58:39,860 --> 00:58:41,838
- But seeing 'em put it all together...
- Yeah?

1078
00:58:42,522 --> 00:58:44,507
...it really stinks, don't it?

1079
00:58:45,227 --> 00:58:45,990
Yeah.

1080
00:58:46,015 --> 00:58:47,249
[door opens]

1081
00:58:50,173 --> 00:58:51,839
Penny, you were just great tonight.

1082
00:58:51,955 --> 00:58:52,818
Thanks.

1083
00:58:53,038 --> 00:58:55,264
- Too bad the show wasn't.
- Where's Choirboy?

1084
00:58:55,332 --> 00:58:56,079
Last time I saw him,

1085
00:58:56,104 --> 00:58:58,535
he was standing in the lobby
asking people not to leave.

1086
00:58:58,948 --> 00:59:01,631
- That was after the first act.
- Oh, gosh.

1087
00:59:01,773 --> 00:59:04,495
I'm really worried about him.
He might do something crazy.

1088
00:59:04,581 --> 00:59:07,384
The guy who put $50,000 in this show,
do something crazy?

1089
00:59:07,466 --> 00:59:08,899
Perish the thought!

1090
00:59:09,333 --> 00:59:11,196
I tell you, the show is okay.

1091
00:59:11,221 --> 00:59:13,843
So Rossi got a little stage fright,
the audience scared him.

1092
00:59:13,886 --> 00:59:16,246
Tomorrow we should be great.
There won't be anybody in the theater.

1093
00:59:16,299 --> 00:59:19,490
Never mind the wisecracks!
I know the show didn't get anything.

1094
00:59:19,549 --> 00:59:20,637
Oh, yes, it did.

1095
00:59:20,705 --> 00:59:22,946
In the Bronx, you'd have heard it,
but in Boston, it's silent.

1096
00:59:23,093 --> 00:59:24,734
Well, maybe the audience was moved.

1097
00:59:24,808 --> 00:59:26,597
Nobody applauded Lincoln at Gettysburg.

1098
00:59:26,697 --> 00:59:28,971
Could be. All the show needs
is a few little changes.

1099
00:59:29,024 --> 00:59:31,461
Yeah, look, I got a little routine
about a chief petty officer, see...

1100
00:59:31,530 --> 00:59:33,697
and he walks up to me and says,
"Are you nautical?"

1101
00:59:33,750 --> 00:59:35,512
I said, "Sir, I do have my moments."

1102
00:59:37,937 --> 00:59:38,708
[door closes]

1103
00:59:38,811 --> 00:59:40,650
- Hello, Mr. Woods.
- Hello, sweetheart.

1104
00:59:40,710 --> 00:59:43,907
Oh, cheer up, a few little changes,
and we got the whole...

1105
00:59:45,509 --> 00:59:46,976
What's all this? A new script?

1106
00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:48,398
Notes... on what I didn't like.

1107
00:59:48,442 --> 00:59:50,722
Oh, pay no attention
to the audience reaction,

1108
00:59:50,747 --> 00:59:52,055
it's the critics that count.

1109
00:59:52,141 --> 00:59:54,517
I got a boy pickin' up
the early editions, and we'll see.

1110
00:59:54,571 --> 00:59:56,567
But Mr. Woods, I didn't like it.

1111
00:59:56,641 --> 00:59:58,048
It didn't even make sense,
none of it.

1112
00:59:58,094 --> 00:59:59,423
[Rossi groaning]

1113
00:59:59,669 --> 01:00:01,102
Now what?

1114
01:00:01,666 --> 01:00:02,666
Oh...

1115
01:00:02,821 --> 01:00:06,489
Oh, no, no, no!
How did you do that?

1116
01:00:06,548 --> 01:00:07,617
Oh, my leg.

1117
01:00:07,703 --> 01:00:09,893
I broke in the dressing room
right after the show.

1118
01:00:09,980 --> 01:00:11,109
What rotten timing.

1119
01:00:11,148 --> 01:00:13,470
Oh, come on,
let's get him to a chair.

1120
01:00:14,844 --> 01:00:17,687
Mr. Woods, what about the Navy scenes?

1121
01:00:17,808 --> 01:00:20,343
You know, I'm beginnin' to see
why you kept us away from rehearsals.

1122
01:00:20,370 --> 01:00:23,640
Oh, never mind the Navy scenes,
can't you see my star just broke his leg?

1123
01:00:23,736 --> 01:00:26,002
Mr. Rossi, don't worry about a thing.

1124
01:00:26,049 --> 01:00:27,210
I'll have Webster rewrite,

1125
01:00:27,243 --> 01:00:29,179
and you'll do all your scenes
from a wheelchair.

1126
01:00:29,230 --> 01:00:29,969
It'll be a new twist.

1127
01:00:29,994 --> 01:00:30,633
[buzzer buzzing]

1128
01:00:30,664 --> 01:00:31,787
Oh, the reviews.

1129
01:00:32,569 --> 01:00:33,724
[Rossi groaning]

1130
01:00:33,804 --> 01:00:36,212
Sorry. I'm sorry.
Put that away, will you?

1131
01:00:37,447 --> 01:00:38,981
- Papers, ma'am.
- Thanks.

1132
01:00:39,086 --> 01:00:40,149
Hey, boy.

1133
01:00:40,742 --> 01:00:44,047
- No, thanks, I've read 'em.
- Oh, another critic.

1134
01:00:50,127 --> 01:00:51,861
- Mr. Rossi.
- Well?

1135
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:53,756
Here's something that will interest you.

1136
01:00:54,093 --> 01:00:57,279
"The audience forgave Emilio Rossi
for forgetting his lines,"

1137
01:00:57,473 --> 01:00:59,114
"but not for remembering them."

1138
01:00:59,186 --> 01:01:00,323
What?

1139
01:01:00,897 --> 01:01:03,046
I knew you were fakin' with that foot!

1140
01:01:03,114 --> 01:01:05,294
Well, kick him, honey,
and make it for real.

1141
01:01:05,760 --> 01:01:07,526
Well!

1142
01:01:07,647 --> 01:01:09,499
I'm not going back in this show.

1143
01:01:09,566 --> 01:01:11,499
You can't fix it, and you know it.

1144
01:01:11,587 --> 01:01:13,690
Besides, I've got
a reputation to protect.

1145
01:01:13,730 --> 01:01:15,759
- You also got a contract.
- Sue me.

1146
01:01:15,852 --> 01:01:17,447
We built the whole show around you!

1147
01:01:17,647 --> 01:01:20,002
You can rebuild it around her!

1148
01:01:20,093 --> 01:01:22,272
That's what she wanted
all the time, anyway.

1149
01:01:22,405 --> 01:01:23,426
What do you mean by that?

1150
01:01:23,479 --> 01:01:25,947
Why do you suppose
she played up to you fellas?

1151
01:01:26,049 --> 01:01:28,137
With a star of my stature in the show,

1152
01:01:28,187 --> 01:01:31,755
she would have been a nobody,
unless she had influence.

1153
01:01:32,632 --> 01:01:34,057
You don't believe him, do you?

1154
01:01:34,638 --> 01:01:35,758
I don't know what to believe.

1155
01:01:36,232 --> 01:01:38,529
Everybody in this business
seems to be for himself.

1156
01:01:39,082 --> 01:01:40,212
Are you nuts?

1157
01:01:40,319 --> 01:01:42,318
Penny was good in the show,
she doesn't need any favors.

1158
01:01:42,354 --> 01:01:43,200
You saw that.

1159
01:01:43,573 --> 01:01:45,876
Yeah, but...
She got us into this, didn't she?

1160
01:01:45,932 --> 01:01:46,863
No!

1161
01:01:46,913 --> 01:01:50,413
Well... she said he was okay
when all the time she knew he was lying.

1162
01:01:50,560 --> 01:01:52,329
Me? Lie?

1163
01:01:53,260 --> 01:01:55,975
I didn't know we'd fail. I'm sorry.

1164
01:01:56,155 --> 01:01:57,621
Fail? Who said we failed?

1165
01:01:57,788 --> 01:01:59,286
Just the audience and critics.

1166
01:01:59,376 --> 01:02:02,359
I'll have the whole show fixed up
before we open in New York.

1167
01:02:02,461 --> 01:02:04,094
It's no good, Mr. Woods.

1168
01:02:04,674 --> 01:02:07,492
Look, Twitch, I'm goin' back to the ship
and telling the fellas the truth.

1169
01:02:07,673 --> 01:02:10,353
At least I can spare them
another week of false hope.

1170
01:02:12,067 --> 01:02:14,116
I wish somebody had spared me.

1171
01:02:14,413 --> 01:02:16,347
[melancholic music]

1172
01:02:19,547 --> 01:02:21,038
I don't get it.

1173
01:02:21,604 --> 01:02:23,980
I've seen this guy under fire
with all the odds against him,

1174
01:02:24,041 --> 01:02:24,868
and he's never quit.

1175
01:02:25,089 --> 01:02:27,016
That was war.
This is show business.

1176
01:02:27,226 --> 01:02:28,148
Much tougher.

1177
01:02:28,287 --> 01:02:30,753
Ah, we got no time for postmortems.

1178
01:02:30,819 --> 01:02:32,575
Other shows have been
in spots like this before,

1179
01:02:32,600 --> 01:02:34,151
and they came out to be big hits.

1180
01:02:34,304 --> 01:02:36,213
All we need now is cool heads.

1181
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:38,348
We'll close down here,
go back to New York,

1182
01:02:38,399 --> 01:02:41,117
write out Rossi, build up Penny,
get a director,

1183
01:02:41,183 --> 01:02:43,032
we can do an awful lot in a week or two.

1184
01:02:43,153 --> 01:02:44,300
Don't be discouraged.

1185
01:02:44,359 --> 01:02:47,617
I tell you, "USS Texas"
is still gonna be a big hit.

1186
01:02:48,086 --> 01:02:50,800
Hello, Joe. How do you like this?

1187
01:02:51,534 --> 01:02:53,412
- Is this what you wanted?
- Oh, yeah, that's fine.

1188
01:02:53,443 --> 01:02:55,578
Now paint in the reviews,
and stick it in front of the theater.

1189
01:02:55,614 --> 01:02:56,860
These Boston reviews?

1190
01:02:56,940 --> 01:02:58,703
Kramer, you've done
this work for me before,

1191
01:02:58,728 --> 01:03:00,056
there's always somethin' you can use.

1192
01:03:00,107 --> 01:03:02,173
Here: "Outstanding flop."

1193
01:03:02,354 --> 01:03:03,426
"Outstanding."

1194
01:03:03,754 --> 01:03:05,616
"Doubtless, the play was overpowering."

1195
01:03:05,880 --> 01:03:06,927
"Overpowering."

1196
01:03:07,394 --> 01:03:09,092
"Masterpiece of incompetence."

1197
01:03:09,414 --> 01:03:10,414
"Masterpiece."

1198
01:03:10,519 --> 01:03:11,781
Okay, if that's what you want.

1199
01:03:11,814 --> 01:03:13,929
Yeah, that's what I want.
And by the way...

1200
01:03:14,133 --> 01:03:16,518
Don't paint the title in yet,
I'm lining up some new backers.

1201
01:03:16,573 --> 01:03:17,814
- I gotcha.
- Good.

1202
01:03:18,026 --> 01:03:19,055
Thank you, Kramer.

1203
01:03:21,657 --> 01:03:24,081
The answer is no,
I haven't seen or heard from your buddy.

1204
01:03:24,108 --> 01:03:25,308
And why aren't you at the theater?

1205
01:03:25,333 --> 01:03:27,490
The place is a madhouse
ever since the author walked out.

1206
01:03:27,550 --> 01:03:28,525
Nobody's in charge.

1207
01:03:28,567 --> 01:03:30,387
That's the worst show
I've seen since Boston.

1208
01:03:30,593 --> 01:03:31,988
There's people that can fix it.

1209
01:03:32,067 --> 01:03:33,516
Only word's out that we're in trouble,

1210
01:03:33,541 --> 01:03:35,445
and they want more cash
in advance than I got.

1211
01:03:35,505 --> 01:03:36,678
That's why we came, Mr. Woods,

1212
01:03:36,702 --> 01:03:38,942
we think Choirboy is right
about the show being hopeless.

1213
01:03:39,167 --> 01:03:41,451
What we want you to do is
return whatever money is left.

1214
01:03:41,694 --> 01:03:43,859
What about the people who
gave their time and their talents?

1215
01:03:43,893 --> 01:03:45,317
The least they're
entitled to is an opening.

1216
01:03:45,495 --> 01:03:46,516
Not the kind they're gonna get.

1217
01:03:46,541 --> 01:03:47,424
[phone ringing]

1218
01:03:47,500 --> 01:03:49,113
Oh, that must be the money man now.

1219
01:03:49,453 --> 01:03:50,486
Hello.

1220
01:03:50,700 --> 01:03:51,801
Hello, speaking.

1221
01:03:52,807 --> 01:03:53,907
Oh.

1222
01:03:54,685 --> 01:03:56,132
He went to Bermuda, huh?

1223
01:03:58,117 --> 01:04:00,858
Funny how far away they can get
when they know you're after money.

1224
01:04:01,378 --> 01:04:04,149
[slow music]

1225
01:04:20,741 --> 01:04:21,944
Hey, son.

1226
01:04:22,671 --> 01:04:24,975
You better get yourself
straightened out before you report.

1227
01:04:25,101 --> 01:04:26,455
Skipper's aboard.

1228
01:04:26,715 --> 01:04:27,597
Yeah.

1229
01:04:28,475 --> 01:04:29,585
You, uh...

1230
01:04:30,051 --> 01:04:31,962
You sure got the ol' tub shinin' again.

1231
01:04:32,302 --> 01:04:35,191
Ain't nothin' so full of holes
it can't be patched up.

1232
01:04:35,708 --> 01:04:38,515
Man, beast, ship or what have you.

1233
01:04:40,067 --> 01:04:41,845
Yeah, I guess you're right.

1234
01:04:43,908 --> 01:04:45,842
[music continues]

1235
01:04:59,660 --> 01:05:00,984
Hey, Choirboy!

1236
01:05:02,214 --> 01:05:05,054
Hey, fellas, Choirboy is back!
Come on above!

1237
01:05:05,255 --> 01:05:07,188
[men talking indistinctly]

1238
01:05:11,128 --> 01:05:12,781
Hey, when does the show open?

1239
01:05:12,901 --> 01:05:15,261
Look... what did we net in Boston?

1240
01:05:15,430 --> 01:05:18,628
Oh, Boston? Oh, good, good, Hank.

1241
01:05:19,786 --> 01:05:23,146
Everything is... great, fellas.
It's gonna be just great.

1242
01:05:23,521 --> 01:05:24,721
We open on Broadway in a week.

1243
01:05:24,808 --> 01:05:27,037
Hey, you look like
you've been workin' hard!

1244
01:05:27,289 --> 01:05:28,357
Yeah.

1245
01:05:28,468 --> 01:05:31,040
As a matter of fact, I'm...
I'm due at the theater right now.

1246
01:05:31,187 --> 01:05:32,109
I...

1247
01:05:32,568 --> 01:05:34,920
I just thought I'd come down
and tell you guys that it's...

1248
01:05:35,020 --> 01:05:36,126
...it's gonna be okay.

1249
01:05:37,027 --> 01:05:39,061
- I gotta get back.
- Oh, wait a minute..

1250
01:05:39,101 --> 01:05:41,035
[men talking indistinctly]

1251
01:05:43,568 --> 01:05:45,602
Well, have him call me back,
it's important.

1252
01:05:46,661 --> 01:05:49,561
Please, those long faces,
they cramp my style.

1253
01:05:49,673 --> 01:05:51,481
If you wanna be miserable,
please leave.

1254
01:05:51,506 --> 01:05:53,237
[phone ringing]

1255
01:05:54,918 --> 01:05:57,561
Hello. Hello, Tom...
Tom, listen.

1256
01:05:57,759 --> 01:05:58,835
I'm in a spot,

1257
01:05:58,921 --> 01:06:01,117
I wanna sell you
half interest of my show.

1258
01:06:01,904 --> 01:06:03,353
<i>- I'm in a spot.</i>
- Oh, <i>you're</i> in a spot.

1259
01:06:03,378 --> 01:06:06,182
- I <i>need 25 grand.</i>
- <i>You</i> need 25 grand...

1260
01:06:06,387 --> 01:06:08,163
<i>I</i> need 25 grand.

1261
01:06:08,423 --> 01:06:10,179
But, Tom, I got a great show...

1262
01:06:10,827 --> 01:06:12,602
Oh, yeah. <i>You</i> got a great show.

1263
01:06:13,354 --> 01:06:15,705
- <i>...Gary Cooper...</i>
- Gary Cooper?

1264
01:06:16,025 --> 01:06:17,720
Gary Cooper in a musical?

1265
01:06:17,827 --> 01:06:19,942
Tom, you're a genius! You'll clean up!

1266
01:06:21,700 --> 01:06:23,706
- Uh, uh, Tom...
- <i>If I had the money, I...</i>

1267
01:06:23,766 --> 01:06:24,728
Tom, yeah, it's...

1268
01:06:24,795 --> 01:06:27,545
Tom, if I had the money,
I'd put it in <i>your</i> show.

1269
01:06:27,681 --> 01:06:30,181
But if I had the money,
why would I call you in the first place?

1270
01:06:30,347 --> 01:06:32,074
Alright, you called me!

1271
01:06:33,528 --> 01:06:34,816
How do you like that?

1272
01:06:34,931 --> 01:06:38,694
He's got Gary Cooper,
I had to get stuck with Emilio Rossi.

1273
01:06:39,688 --> 01:06:41,270
I'll try Henderson.

1274
01:06:43,653 --> 01:06:46,048
Hey, Choirboy! Where you been?
We've been lookin' all over for you.

1275
01:06:46,093 --> 01:06:49,158
- Boy, are we glad to see you!
- Fellas. Miss Weston.

1276
01:06:49,461 --> 01:06:50,574
Mr. Woods...

1277
01:06:51,194 --> 01:06:52,368
I'm takin' over the show.

1278
01:06:52,455 --> 01:06:53,843
I told you he was no quitter.

1279
01:06:54,202 --> 01:06:55,798
I'm gonna pull this show through,

1280
01:06:55,905 --> 01:06:57,640
for my shipmates
and for no other reason.

1281
01:06:57,693 --> 01:06:59,009
(Woods) Wait a minute,
I'm the producer.

1282
01:06:59,175 --> 01:07:01,351
And I don't want you to needle Penny.
She's the star now.

1283
01:07:01,617 --> 01:07:02,952
It's alright, Mr. Woods.

1284
01:07:03,158 --> 01:07:04,515
I can take care of myself.

1285
01:07:04,754 --> 01:07:07,223
You had your chance as producer
and failed, Mr. Woods.

1286
01:07:07,296 --> 01:07:08,577
And now I'm askin' you to step out.

1287
01:07:08,637 --> 01:07:11,013
And I'm tellin' ya to get your own show
if you wanna play producer.

1288
01:07:11,075 --> 01:07:13,117
- Well, I want this one!
- Well, you can't have it.

1289
01:07:13,490 --> 01:07:15,180
I own 51 percent of this show,

1290
01:07:15,205 --> 01:07:18,095
and 'til you buy me out,
you're just another silent partner.

1291
01:07:18,295 --> 01:07:20,085
Okay... how much do you want?

1292
01:07:20,215 --> 01:07:22,205
- Yeah, how much?
- Yeah, how much?

1293
01:07:23,593 --> 01:07:25,561
(Choirboy) What'll you take
for your 51 percent?

1294
01:07:25,735 --> 01:07:27,937
Choirboy, don't be a fool.

1295
01:07:28,745 --> 01:07:30,319
Don't worry, Miss Weston.

1296
01:07:30,488 --> 01:07:32,328
This time I know what I'm doing.

1297
01:07:34,570 --> 01:07:36,503
- Are you serious?
- How much?

1298
01:07:36,579 --> 01:07:38,988
Costumes, scenery, the whole works.

1299
01:07:39,241 --> 01:07:41,337
Well... it's hard to say.

1300
01:07:41,490 --> 01:07:43,532
It's a very valuable piece of property.

1301
01:07:43,786 --> 01:07:46,289
- Another fifty thousand...
- I'll give you twenty-five thousand.

1302
01:07:46,388 --> 01:07:47,422
Dollars?

1303
01:07:47,756 --> 01:07:50,126
Twenty-five thousand dollars.

1304
01:07:50,366 --> 01:07:51,207
I'll take it.

1305
01:07:51,274 --> 01:07:52,875
I'll have my lawyer draw up the papers,

1306
01:07:52,902 --> 01:07:55,618
and you be here first thing
in the morning with the dough.

1307
01:07:55,812 --> 01:07:58,721
- I'll be here.
- Sweetheart, it's your baby.

1308
01:07:59,075 --> 01:08:02,195
Gary Cooper in a musical...
I'm a genius!

1309
01:08:04,128 --> 01:08:07,628
I know you don't trust me, but...
you can't do a crazy thing like this.

1310
01:08:07,809 --> 01:08:10,873
- This show's a mess!
- Well, I'll straighten it out.

1311
01:08:11,148 --> 01:08:12,983
All I want from you
is a good performance.

1312
01:08:14,009 --> 01:08:15,744
I'll do my best, Mr. Jones...

1313
01:08:15,960 --> 01:08:18,127
...if you're quite sure
you still want me in the show.

1314
01:08:18,347 --> 01:08:20,129
'Course, I want you, you're wonderful.

1315
01:08:20,701 --> 01:08:23,701
But in this business, we mustn't let
personal feelings influence us.

1316
01:08:26,769 --> 01:08:28,961
Look, 'Boy, I just wanna know one thing.

1317
01:08:29,084 --> 01:08:31,601
Where did you get the
twenty-five thousand dollars?

1318
01:08:32,662 --> 01:08:34,450
As a matter of fact, I haven't got it.

1319
01:08:34,664 --> 01:08:36,105
I haven't got a dime.

1320
01:08:36,328 --> 01:08:37,247
You what?

1321
01:08:37,621 --> 01:08:39,222
But don't worry,
I'll dig it up someplace.

1322
01:08:39,354 --> 01:08:41,250
How? We can't even buy a shovel.

1323
01:08:41,395 --> 01:08:43,213
Oh, but he'll... he'll dig it up.

1324
01:08:43,276 --> 01:08:44,906
He'll dig it up.

1325
01:08:48,761 --> 01:08:50,695
[band music]

1326
01:09:02,228 --> 01:09:04,161
[music continues]

1327
01:09:12,007 --> 01:09:14,609
Say, that's the Marine outfit
that was in the paper this morning.

1328
01:09:14,764 --> 01:09:16,839
Cut off behind enemy lines
for three months.

1329
01:09:16,884 --> 01:09:18,301
Now you're getting the idea.

1330
01:09:18,374 --> 01:09:20,596
Back home, and loaded with back pay!

1331
01:09:20,662 --> 01:09:23,112
Ah-ha, the good ol' Marines!

1332
01:09:23,554 --> 01:09:26,755
I tell you, fellas,
it gives a man pause.

1333
01:09:27,254 --> 01:09:29,832
Well, looks like the Navy and Marines
are partners again.

1334
01:09:30,155 --> 01:09:32,268
Yeah, the Marines are always
yelling about rescuing the Navy.

1335
01:09:32,328 --> 01:09:34,361
- Now's their big chance.
- You're so right.

1336
01:09:34,414 --> 01:09:36,906
- You're not really going to do it...
- Yes, I am.

1337
01:09:37,095 --> 01:09:38,361
Well, count me out.

1338
01:09:38,614 --> 01:09:39,822
You're in, Penny.

1339
01:09:39,947 --> 01:09:42,214
I'm the producer now,
just like Mr. Woods.

1340
01:09:42,361 --> 01:09:43,793
You charmed us into backing the show,

1341
01:09:43,826 --> 01:09:46,301
now you're gonna do the same thing,
to the Marines.

1342
01:09:46,628 --> 01:09:48,070
Come on, fellas, let's go.

1343
01:09:51,620 --> 01:09:53,056
(both) Here we go again.

1344
01:09:56,633 --> 01:09:59,995
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me, kiss me,
or I'll scream ♪

1345
01:10:00,363 --> 01:10:01,157
[screaming]

1346
01:10:01,181 --> 01:10:03,766
♪ You better pucker up
and kiss me or I'll... ♪

1347
01:10:04,002 --> 01:10:05,388
♪ ...blow my top ♪

1348
01:10:05,921 --> 01:10:08,011
♪ What's with all the conversation ♪

1349
01:10:08,098 --> 01:10:09,839
♪ 'Bout the national debt ♪

1350
01:10:10,302 --> 01:10:12,154
♪ I could get more oscillation ♪

1351
01:10:12,221 --> 01:10:14,028
♪ From an old Civil War bet ♪

1352
01:10:14,457 --> 01:10:17,595
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me, kiss me,
or I'll scream ♪

1353
01:10:18,073 --> 01:10:18,807
[screaming]

1354
01:10:18,863 --> 01:10:21,704
♪ You better put your arms
around me or I'll... ♪

1355
01:10:21,770 --> 01:10:23,170
♪ ...call a cop ♪

1356
01:10:23,318 --> 01:10:25,340
♪ You're making an absolute nightmare ♪

1357
01:10:25,448 --> 01:10:27,548
♪ Of a perfectly wonderful dream ♪

1358
01:10:27,623 --> 01:10:30,366
♪ You better kiss me, kiss me,
kiss me, kiss me ♪

1359
01:10:30,595 --> 01:10:36,018
♪ Or I'll scream ♪

1360
01:10:36,220 --> 01:10:38,386
[screaming]

1361
01:10:38,528 --> 01:10:40,595
[crowd whistling]

1362
01:10:40,876 --> 01:10:42,545
- Well, what do you think?
- Count me in.

1363
01:10:42,599 --> 01:10:43,519
I'll take part of that.

1364
01:10:43,586 --> 01:10:45,013
It's good enough for you,
it's good enough for us.

1365
01:10:45,108 --> 01:10:47,463
- Hey, don't forget me.
- Yeah, this is the life.

1366
01:10:47,740 --> 01:10:49,540
[crowd cheering]

1367
01:10:51,101 --> 01:10:52,934
Target on radar scope.

1368
01:10:53,027 --> 01:10:55,127
Bearing 170.

1369
01:10:55,261 --> 01:10:58,774
Trajectory angle, 9-5 on 4 megacycle.

1370
01:10:58,887 --> 01:11:02,437
Boys, commence firing pennant.
Change course to 0-0-1.

1371
01:11:02,570 --> 01:11:05,361
Pressure point 9-2-6 over 18
on neutron rebound.

1372
01:11:05,461 --> 01:11:10,439
Aye, aye, sir.
Up-take 42 on neutron rebound.

1373
01:11:10,860 --> 01:11:12,708
Don't you think this dialogue
is a little too...

1374
01:11:12,768 --> 01:11:14,550
...technical for people to understand?

1375
01:11:15,260 --> 01:11:16,394
Well, I understand it.

1376
01:11:16,514 --> 01:11:18,100
Yeah, but you wrote it.

1377
01:11:18,261 --> 01:11:19,003
Now, look, fellas,

1378
01:11:19,028 --> 01:11:20,969
don't worry about a thing,
it's gonna be great.

1379
01:11:21,430 --> 01:11:23,128
Okay, everybody, five minutes' recess,

1380
01:11:23,153 --> 01:11:25,101
and we'll come back and
rehearse my new finale.

1381
01:11:26,829 --> 01:11:29,741
- Hey, how'd that sound to you?
- Just like Choirboy...

1382
01:11:30,065 --> 01:11:30,770
...dough!

1383
01:11:30,834 --> 01:11:34,042
All I can say is,
it better be great opening night.

1384
01:11:38,328 --> 01:11:40,730
- I'm worried.
- I know what you mean.

1385
01:11:41,087 --> 01:11:44,134
I think Choirboy's taken on a job
a little bit too big for himself.

1386
01:11:44,334 --> 01:11:47,128
Those Marines aren't gonna like it
if the show flops with their money in it.

1387
01:11:47,195 --> 01:11:48,705
Yeah, look how annoyed
they were in Guadalcanal,

1388
01:11:48,730 --> 01:11:49,871
and when they didn't have dime in it.

1389
01:11:49,895 --> 01:11:50,693
Yeah...

1390
01:11:50,748 --> 01:11:52,356
Choirboy has a lotta nerve, but...

1391
01:11:52,534 --> 01:11:54,528
It takes more than nerve
to get a good show together.

1392
01:11:54,710 --> 01:11:56,552
What we need is a good
director and playwright.

1393
01:11:56,641 --> 01:11:58,019
And a good songwriter.

1394
01:11:58,154 --> 01:12:00,309
Oh, those songs Choirboy's written...

1395
01:12:00,529 --> 01:12:02,485
You need a slide rule to understand 'em!

1396
01:12:03,552 --> 01:12:05,201
Something's gotta be done.

1397
01:12:05,994 --> 01:12:07,590
You got any ideas?

1398
01:12:08,809 --> 01:12:09,946
Yeah.

1399
01:12:10,365 --> 01:12:12,995
- But I'll need your help.
- Anytime!

1400
01:12:13,461 --> 01:12:14,750
Wait'll I change.

1401
01:12:17,295 --> 01:12:19,228
[symphonic music]

1402
01:12:29,992 --> 01:12:32,709
Oh, Mr. Abbott,
they told me I'd find you here.

1403
01:12:32,842 --> 01:12:35,384
- They did?
- Yes, I just adored the show!

1404
01:12:35,457 --> 01:12:37,866
And all the other wonderful
shows you've directed.

1405
01:12:38,006 --> 01:12:39,867
Thank you.
There something I can do for you?

1406
01:12:39,921 --> 01:12:41,544
Oh, I'm so glad you asked me.

1407
01:12:41,660 --> 01:12:43,792
I just happen to be with a show
that needs some work.

1408
01:12:44,085 --> 01:12:46,341
Mine takes up so much of my time, I...

1409
01:12:46,462 --> 01:12:49,032
...don't think I'd be interested in
working on any other show.

1410
01:12:49,388 --> 01:12:51,821
- At any price.
- But we weren't going to pay you.

1411
01:12:52,100 --> 01:12:54,864
Well... of course, that puts
a different light on the matter.

1412
01:12:55,563 --> 01:12:57,795
In that case,
I'm definitely not interested.

1413
01:12:58,319 --> 01:12:59,835
But it's for the United States Navy!

1414
01:13:00,108 --> 01:13:02,184
- United States Navy?
- Yes.

1415
01:13:02,391 --> 01:13:03,847
These are just two of the backers.

1416
01:13:03,922 --> 01:13:07,196
The rest are their shipmates,
and a heroic Marine outfit.

1417
01:13:07,763 --> 01:13:10,059
I knew you could get hurt backing shows,

1418
01:13:10,125 --> 01:13:12,401
but I never ran into
anything like this before.

1419
01:13:12,461 --> 01:13:15,431
Oh, Mr. Abbott...
your navy didn't let you down.

1420
01:13:15,551 --> 01:13:17,499
Are you going to let it down?

1421
01:13:17,940 --> 01:13:20,335
Well... since you put it that way...

1422
01:13:20,681 --> 01:13:22,545
...let's have a look at
this show of yours.

1423
01:13:25,581 --> 01:13:27,515
[band music]

1424
01:13:33,034 --> 01:13:35,630
I know you're a very busy man, Mr. Hart,
but we really need you.

1425
01:13:35,682 --> 01:13:37,192
And a little rewriting would do wonders.

1426
01:13:37,222 --> 01:13:39,155
I'm very sorry, Miss Weston.

1427
01:13:40,349 --> 01:13:42,591
Good heavens! Who are they?

1428
01:13:42,749 --> 01:13:44,533
Our backers, Mr. Hart.

1429
01:13:44,765 --> 01:13:46,121
Your Navy.

1430
01:13:47,842 --> 01:13:50,409
♪ Embrace me ♪

1431
01:13:50,576 --> 01:13:55,165
♪ My sweet embraceable you ♪

1432
01:13:57,609 --> 01:14:00,223
♪ Embrace me ♪

1433
01:14:00,282 --> 01:14:06,355
♪ You irreplaceable you ♪

1434
01:14:06,535 --> 01:14:09,371
♪ Just one look at you... ♪

1435
01:14:09,856 --> 01:14:10,886
Oh!

1436
01:14:11,121 --> 01:14:13,175
Mr. Ira Gershwin!

1437
01:14:13,316 --> 01:14:16,472
Oh, I just have to sing
one of your lyrics every morning!

1438
01:14:16,531 --> 01:14:17,480
Well, thank you.

1439
01:14:17,533 --> 01:14:20,503
But must it be on my piano,
and in my apartment?

1440
01:14:21,503 --> 01:14:22,704
I am sorry.

1441
01:14:22,836 --> 01:14:26,035
But my producers insisted on
meeting you personally.

1442
01:14:26,415 --> 01:14:27,715
Boys...

1443
01:14:29,223 --> 01:14:30,740
...Mr. Ira Gershwin.

1444
01:14:33,310 --> 01:14:36,959
♪ But now it keeps on singing ♪

1445
01:14:37,150 --> 01:14:45,240
♪ Oh, it sings the whole day through ♪

1446
01:14:45,522 --> 01:14:48,455
♪ And the song ♪

1447
01:14:48,502 --> 01:14:52,702
♪ It keeps singing ♪

1448
01:14:53,009 --> 01:14:59,441
♪ Is you ♪

1449
01:14:59,696 --> 01:15:01,631
Okay, okay, that's pretty good.

1450
01:15:01,797 --> 01:15:04,427
Pretty good, kids, I'll see you all
first thing in the morning.

1451
01:15:05,582 --> 01:15:07,008
Well, gentlemen...

1452
01:15:07,277 --> 01:15:08,130
That's it.

1453
01:15:08,317 --> 01:15:11,060
- Can it be saved?
- Well, it'll be a miracle.

1454
01:15:11,253 --> 01:15:12,808
Like the way you recovered.

1455
01:15:12,903 --> 01:15:14,616
We had an army doctor.

1456
01:15:15,721 --> 01:15:16,776
You, uh...

1457
01:15:16,925 --> 01:15:19,328
...haven't said anything about
how you think it's going.

1458
01:15:19,496 --> 01:15:21,429
Uh... the show, I mean.

1459
01:15:21,756 --> 01:15:23,199
Wouldn't that be presumptuous?

1460
01:15:23,443 --> 01:15:25,802
You might remind me
that I only work here.

1461
01:15:27,690 --> 01:15:29,685
Now, look, Penny, maybe I carried
this "strictly professional" stuff

1462
01:15:29,710 --> 01:15:30,759
a little too far, but...

1463
01:15:30,844 --> 01:15:32,787
After all, we're working together...

1464
01:15:32,935 --> 01:15:34,884
...as friends, aren't we?

1465
01:15:35,605 --> 01:15:37,272
Friends in show business?

1466
01:15:37,593 --> 01:15:39,147
You're not getting sentimental?

1467
01:15:39,339 --> 01:15:42,905
The fellow who said we mustn't
let personal feelings influence us?

1468
01:15:43,145 --> 01:15:44,313
Hey, Choirboy?

1469
01:15:44,612 --> 01:15:45,949
Some men to see you out front.

1470
01:15:46,062 --> 01:15:48,299
- Well, who are they?
- Big shots from show business.

1471
01:15:48,397 --> 01:15:49,425
Come on down and say hello.

1472
01:15:49,465 --> 01:15:51,647
Oh, look, Twitch, I'm busy.
What do they want?

1473
01:15:51,741 --> 01:15:53,382
Oh, it's an old Broadway custom.

1474
01:15:53,489 --> 01:15:55,777
They heard there was trouble,
and they came to help out.

1475
01:15:55,986 --> 01:15:58,587
This isn't really as heartless
a business as you thought.

1476
01:16:04,472 --> 01:16:05,596
Good afternoon, gentlemen.

1477
01:16:05,679 --> 01:16:07,582
- Hi, how are you?
- Hello.

1478
01:16:08,232 --> 01:16:09,155
Well...

1479
01:16:09,776 --> 01:16:10,781
What did you think of the show?

1480
01:16:10,926 --> 01:16:12,594
- Provocative.
- Unusual.

1481
01:16:12,694 --> 01:16:13,843
Amazing.

1482
01:16:14,302 --> 01:16:16,945
We've heard a lot about
your subs' war experiences.

1483
01:16:17,192 --> 01:16:19,594
I'd like to have seen some of
that material in the show.

1484
01:16:19,686 --> 01:16:22,724
You're better off writing about
first-hand experiences, you know.

1485
01:16:23,038 --> 01:16:24,807
But we're dealing with a musical here.

1486
01:16:24,960 --> 01:16:27,760
Set the scene on a submarine,
and there'd be no girls.

1487
01:16:28,056 --> 01:16:29,672
What's a musical without girls?

1488
01:16:29,879 --> 01:16:31,386
What's anything without girls?

1489
01:16:31,439 --> 01:16:34,576
Well, the only girls in the submarine,
gentlemen, are in the men's dreams.

1490
01:16:34,736 --> 01:16:36,260
And even that's against regulations.

1491
01:16:36,326 --> 01:16:38,060
A dream sequence on a submarine...

1492
01:16:38,213 --> 01:16:40,623
Hmm... I might be able to
get a sketch outta that.

1493
01:16:40,760 --> 01:16:42,991
I've got a pen that writes underwater.

1494
01:16:43,993 --> 01:16:45,475
A sailor's dream, eh?

1495
01:16:45,574 --> 01:16:48,264
Well... it has possibilities, musically.

1496
01:16:48,463 --> 01:16:51,666
Y'know, according to what I've seen,
these boys are good performers.

1497
01:16:52,041 --> 01:16:53,402
It's an exploitation angle.

1498
01:16:53,642 --> 01:16:56,713
Acted, sung, and danced
by the men who lived it.

1499
01:16:57,065 --> 01:16:58,581
We might get a hit yet.

1500
01:16:59,834 --> 01:17:01,293
Yeah, thanks to you.

1501
01:17:01,603 --> 01:17:04,579
You're a real doll for rescuing Choirboy
after the way he acted.

1502
01:17:04,918 --> 01:17:06,361
I didn't do it for him.

1503
01:17:06,608 --> 01:17:08,289
I'm in the show, too, you know.

1504
01:17:09,051 --> 01:17:10,560
Yeah, sure.

1505
01:17:12,239 --> 01:17:14,173
[symphonic music]

1506
01:17:27,797 --> 01:17:29,871
Coleman, drama critic
for the Daily Mirror.

1507
01:17:30,173 --> 01:17:31,526
Deploy!

1508
01:17:40,990 --> 01:17:43,833
Richard Watts Jr., Post.
McClain, Journal-American.

1509
01:17:43,905 --> 01:17:45,293
Deploy!

1510
01:17:47,683 --> 01:17:50,158
Walter Kerr, drama critic
for the Herald Tribune.

1511
01:17:50,231 --> 01:17:51,480
Deploy!

1512
01:17:56,552 --> 01:17:58,646
- You fellas ushering?
- Nah, we're producing.

1513
01:17:58,726 --> 01:18:00,950
- We hope you like the show.
- I do too, for your sake.

1514
01:18:00,986 --> 01:18:02,464
We do too, for your sake.

1515
01:18:08,086 --> 01:18:10,019
[symphonic music]

1516
01:18:17,312 --> 01:18:19,245
[music continues]

1517
01:18:24,220 --> 01:18:25,948
♪ Hear this, now hear this

1518
01:18:27,179 --> 01:18:30,252
♪ We're gonna put a Navy show on ♪

1519
01:18:30,393 --> 01:18:32,228
♪ Hear this, now hear this

1520
01:18:33,338 --> 01:18:35,905
♪ The show is just about to go on ♪

1521
01:18:37,079 --> 01:18:39,013
[band music]

1522
01:18:44,059 --> 01:18:46,659
♪ Here comes the Navy ♪

1523
01:18:46,964 --> 01:18:49,604
♪ With a-bacon and a-gravy ♪

1524
01:18:50,019 --> 01:18:54,342
♪ Here comes the Navy now ♪

1525
01:18:54,559 --> 01:18:56,492
[band music]

1526
01:19:06,719 --> 01:19:08,653
[audience laughing]

1527
01:19:11,726 --> 01:19:13,016
You've all heard of
Frank Sinatra the voice,

1528
01:19:13,041 --> 01:19:14,356
you've seen Jimmy Durante the nose,

1529
01:19:14,403 --> 01:19:15,737
you are now looking at the lump.

1530
01:19:17,099 --> 01:19:19,760
I'm very proud to be in the Navy,
because my old man was a sailor.

1531
01:19:19,861 --> 01:19:21,504
I'll never forget the day
my mother said to me:

1532
01:19:21,611 --> 01:19:23,112
"There goes your father
up the river again."

1533
01:19:24,920 --> 01:19:26,161
[audience laughing]

1534
01:19:26,211 --> 01:19:27,410
Now, about our little show.

1535
01:19:27,488 --> 01:19:29,075
It tells a very beautiful story

1536
01:19:29,152 --> 01:19:31,393
about a boy who is in the
submarine command,

1537
01:19:31,454 --> 01:19:33,989
and is thrown out because he likes to
sleep with the windows open.

1538
01:19:34,065 --> 01:19:36,199
[audience laughing]

1539
01:19:37,258 --> 01:19:38,054
Well, ladies and gentlemen,

1540
01:19:38,115 --> 01:19:39,788
we're all gonna work
very hard for you tonight,

1541
01:19:39,855 --> 01:19:41,362
because we're feelin' great.

1542
01:19:41,558 --> 01:19:43,731
And there is absolutely
no truth to the rumor

1543
01:19:43,872 --> 01:19:46,202
that the Navy's been
feeding us penguin meat.

1544
01:19:46,645 --> 01:19:49,045
[band music]

1545
01:19:51,705 --> 01:19:53,639
[audience clapping]

1546
01:19:58,915 --> 01:20:04,159
♪ Home is where the heart is

1547
01:20:04,266 --> 01:20:09,891
♪ Wherever you may roam

1548
01:20:10,165 --> 01:20:15,532
♪ If you're where your heart is ♪

1549
01:20:15,653 --> 01:20:20,949
♪ Close your eyes and you'll be home ♪

1550
01:20:21,243 --> 01:20:26,293
♪ Each night when you're dreaming ♪

1551
01:20:26,341 --> 01:20:31,893
♪ My prayers will cross the sea ♪

1552
01:20:32,254 --> 01:20:37,499
♪ Home is where the heart is ♪

1553
01:20:37,612 --> 01:20:42,278
♪ And you are in the heart of me ♪

1554
01:20:43,505 --> 01:20:46,335
- ♪ You'll find me there ♪
- ♪ You'll find me there ♪

1555
01:20:46,467 --> 01:20:49,001
- ♪ No matter where ♪
- ♪ No matter where ♪

1556
01:20:49,050 --> 01:20:53,782
- ♪ Just look for me at Reveille ♪
- ♪ At Reveille ♪

1557
01:20:54,202 --> 01:20:59,213
♪ Home is where the heart is ♪

1558
01:20:59,333 --> 01:21:04,779
♪ Wherever you may roam ♪

1559
01:21:05,119 --> 01:21:10,452
♪ If you are where you heart is ♪

1560
01:21:10,526 --> 01:21:14,826
♪ Close your eyes and you'll be home ♪

1561
01:21:16,026 --> 01:21:17,360
[symphonic music]

1562
01:21:18,888 --> 01:21:21,143
♪ If the dream that you dream
is prolific ♪

1563
01:21:21,278 --> 01:21:23,638
♪ What's the diff
if you're in the Pacific ♪

1564
01:21:23,959 --> 01:21:28,693
♪ Bet you, Jack, you feel you're back
in the good old United States ♪

1565
01:21:31,706 --> 01:21:34,209
♪ And then again let us suppose ♪

1566
01:21:34,355 --> 01:21:36,505
♪ They've put you with the Eskimos ♪

1567
01:21:36,585 --> 01:21:38,893
♪ Cold or hot, you're on the spot ♪

1568
01:21:38,992 --> 01:21:41,309
♪ So don't go askin' for igloo rates ♪

1569
01:21:44,379 --> 01:21:46,795
♪ If they want,
they can send to you Siam ♪

1570
01:21:47,093 --> 01:21:49,371
♪ Though you're feeling
as lonely as I am ♪

1571
01:21:49,592 --> 01:21:52,174
♪ Here's the laugh,
a photograph makes you think ♪

1572
01:21:52,445 --> 01:21:54,642
♪ It's your own hometown ♪

1573
01:21:57,085 --> 01:21:59,722
♪ When any Mexicali babe ♪

1574
01:21:59,795 --> 01:22:01,985
♪ Turns out to be a pally babe ♪

1575
01:22:02,017 --> 01:22:04,118
♪ Memories fly, and by and by ♪

1576
01:22:04,206 --> 01:22:06,802
♪ She's standin' there
when you turn around ♪

1577
01:22:12,245 --> 01:22:16,712
♪ Home is where the heart is ♪

1578
01:22:16,959 --> 01:22:20,925
♪ Wherever you may roam ♪

1579
01:22:22,386 --> 01:22:27,803
♪ If you are where you heart is ♪

1580
01:22:27,885 --> 01:22:36,152
♪ Close your eyes and you'll be home ♪

1581
01:22:39,626 --> 01:22:41,560
[tap music]

1582
01:22:49,239 --> 01:22:51,172
[music continues]

1583
01:22:57,426 --> 01:22:59,359
[music continues]

1584
01:23:07,826 --> 01:23:09,760
[music continues]

1585
01:23:12,771 --> 01:23:14,705
[music continues]

1586
01:23:33,193 --> 01:23:35,126
[music continues]

1587
01:23:51,826 --> 01:23:53,760
[music continues]

1588
01:24:02,632 --> 01:24:04,565
[music continues]

1589
01:24:14,592 --> 01:24:16,525
[music continues]

1590
01:25:09,365 --> 01:25:13,889
♪ Home is where the heart is ♪

1591
01:25:13,992 --> 01:25:18,992
♪ Wherever you may roam ♪

1592
01:25:19,326 --> 01:25:24,192
♪ If you are where you heart is ♪

1593
01:25:24,252 --> 01:25:27,152
♪ Close your eyes and you'll be home ♪

1594
01:25:27,292 --> 01:25:31,006
♪ Home is where the heart is ♪

1595
01:25:31,132 --> 01:25:33,665
♪ So close your eyes ♪

1596
01:25:33,885 --> 01:25:41,576
♪ And you'll be home ♪

1597
01:25:41,631 --> 01:25:43,565
[crowd cheering]

1598
01:25:46,092 --> 01:25:48,203
Sure... sure...

1599
01:25:48,763 --> 01:25:52,969
'Course I realize you're a Navy man!
But the show's all sold out for weeks.

1600
01:25:53,185 --> 01:25:54,536
Hi, you kids.

1601
01:25:56,164 --> 01:25:59,240
Tell you what,
I'll set aside a house ticket for ya.

1602
01:25:59,487 --> 01:26:02,024
My own personal seat. Okay?

1603
01:26:02,646 --> 01:26:05,200
Okay, sweetheart. See ya.

1604
01:26:06,159 --> 01:26:08,417
- "Sweetheart"?
- Who you talking to?

1605
01:26:08,850 --> 01:26:09,699
The Admiral.

1606
01:26:09,911 --> 01:26:11,940
Oh, I beg your pardon, sir.

1607
01:26:12,345 --> 01:26:13,836
You know,
you're still in the Navy, mate.

1608
01:26:13,935 --> 01:26:14,841
That's right.

1609
01:26:14,916 --> 01:26:16,419
What about our numbers
when you have to go back?

1610
01:26:16,472 --> 01:26:17,247
Hey...

1611
01:26:17,280 --> 01:26:19,540
Did you kids read the reviews?
Listen...

1612
01:26:20,878 --> 01:26:22,937
"It didn't require a company of Marines"

1613
01:26:22,971 --> 01:26:25,179
"to make me love
'Three Sailors and a Girl.'"

1614
01:26:25,325 --> 01:26:27,188
"It's a great show all on its own."

1615
01:26:27,366 --> 01:26:29,012
"I'm told the genius..."

1616
01:26:29,337 --> 01:26:30,899
"...is a lad called Choirboy,"

1617
01:26:31,112 --> 01:26:33,426
"whose talents are being
wasted in the Navy."

1618
01:26:33,493 --> 01:26:35,484
"Abbott, Hart, and Gershwin combined"

1619
01:26:35,530 --> 01:26:37,552
"couldn't put together
a show like this one."

1620
01:26:37,945 --> 01:26:39,961
"And Choirboy did it single-handed,"

1621
01:26:40,001 --> 01:26:42,978
"and sang a first-rate
baritone 'deboot.'"

1622
01:26:43,901 --> 01:26:46,995
Hey... who are
Abbott, Hart, and Gershwin?

1623
01:26:47,321 --> 01:26:50,218
Oh... have you forgotten
their names already?

1624
01:26:50,360 --> 01:26:53,000
Abbott, Hart, and Gershwin combined
<i>did</i> put the show together.

1625
01:26:53,059 --> 01:26:54,663
And you can thank Penny for getting 'em.

1626
01:26:55,259 --> 01:26:56,418
Wait a minute...

1627
01:26:56,631 --> 01:26:59,734
Are you tryin' to tell me I had nothing
to do with makin' this show a big hit?

1628
01:26:59,821 --> 01:27:00,802
Oh, you had a lot to do with it.

1629
01:27:01,342 --> 01:27:03,566
You put the show on
and you sang the male lead.

1630
01:27:03,719 --> 01:27:05,307
Which is pretty good for a starter.

1631
01:27:05,739 --> 01:27:06,754
Yeah...

1632
01:27:07,061 --> 01:27:08,429
And don't you forget it.

1633
01:27:08,536 --> 01:27:10,251
How can we? You'll never let us.

1634
01:27:10,365 --> 01:27:13,134
Look, sonny boy, when you come down
out of those clouds, look us up.

1635
01:27:13,212 --> 01:27:14,857
We'll be underwater.
Coming, Penny?

1636
01:27:15,146 --> 01:27:17,004
I'd like to talk to Penny.

1637
01:27:17,265 --> 01:27:19,067
I still work for him, you know.

1638
01:27:19,312 --> 01:27:20,815
I wish that were the only reason.

1639
01:27:20,945 --> 01:27:22,878
- Come on, Porky.
- Okay.

1640
01:27:26,007 --> 01:27:27,662
Now, what did Twitch mean by that?

1641
01:27:28,226 --> 01:27:30,197
He thinks I stayed because I wanted to.

1642
01:27:30,326 --> 01:27:32,593
And not because the boss ordered me to.

1643
01:27:33,726 --> 01:27:35,090
You know something?

1644
01:27:35,739 --> 01:27:37,118
I think he's right.

1645
01:27:37,512 --> 01:27:38,772
You're wrong.

1646
01:27:38,947 --> 01:27:40,919
A very important producer once told me:

1647
01:27:41,062 --> 01:27:43,478
"Never let personal feelings
get in way in this business."

1648
01:27:43,572 --> 01:27:45,805
Look, Penny, I'm sorry I said that.

1649
01:27:46,060 --> 01:27:48,171
But you're right about my
bein' an important producer.

1650
01:27:48,312 --> 01:27:50,492
Boy, I'm goin' places in this business.

1651
01:27:51,185 --> 01:27:52,552
And what about the Navy?

1652
01:27:52,787 --> 01:27:54,262
Well, maybe they'll
agree with that critic

1653
01:27:54,296 --> 01:27:56,371
who said my talents are being wasted.

1654
01:27:56,659 --> 01:27:57,659
Look, Penny...

1655
01:27:57,792 --> 01:27:59,976
I'm gonna be meeting a lot of
important people from now on...

1656
01:28:00,001 --> 01:28:01,890
- ...and I thought that maybe...
- Mr. Jones?

1657
01:28:02,006 --> 01:28:05,113
Sorry to barge in on you like this,
but it's most important.

1658
01:28:05,306 --> 01:28:06,401
Well, uh...

1659
01:28:07,168 --> 01:28:08,339
Did you have an appointment?

1660
01:28:08,460 --> 01:28:09,739
I am A.J. Patterson,

1661
01:28:09,764 --> 01:28:12,754
of the law firm of
Patterson, Kimball, Ackroyd, and Stacey.

1662
01:28:13,755 --> 01:28:15,616
Well, I'm afraid we don't
need any lawsuits.

1663
01:28:15,766 --> 01:28:16,745
You've got one.

1664
01:28:17,286 --> 01:28:19,667
Mr. Jones, I must warn you
not to touch one penny

1665
01:28:19,700 --> 01:28:21,516
of the box office proceeds of this show.

1666
01:28:21,625 --> 01:28:23,425
My clients are attaching it.

1667
01:28:24,460 --> 01:28:26,484
- What?
- What's this all about?

1668
01:28:26,626 --> 01:28:29,871
I represent investors who
bought into this show before you folks.

1669
01:28:29,939 --> 01:28:32,220
Mr. Woods sold more than
a hundred percent, I'm afraid.

1670
01:28:32,332 --> 01:28:34,042
Oh, but he couldn't do that!

1671
01:28:34,705 --> 01:28:36,458
- Or could he?
- He did.

1672
01:28:36,820 --> 01:28:39,174
Young man,
I'm afraid it is not your show.

1673
01:28:39,658 --> 01:28:42,363
However... in order to avoid litigation,

1674
01:28:42,484 --> 01:28:45,774
my clients are willing to repay you
your original investment...

1675
01:28:46,180 --> 01:28:49,077
...in return for a signed release.

1676
01:28:51,152 --> 01:28:53,752
- Signed... release?
- Yes, sir.

1677
01:28:59,085 --> 01:29:02,077
Guess I don't know as much about
this business as I thought I did.

1678
01:29:02,417 --> 01:29:03,418
Well,

1679
01:29:03,657 --> 01:29:06,100
If you've learned that,
you've learned a lot.

1680
01:29:06,713 --> 01:29:09,083
Yeah, but the fellas,
they think they're rich!

1681
01:29:13,251 --> 01:29:14,716
Sign right there, sir.

1682
01:29:19,059 --> 01:29:20,535
Wait here, we'll be right with you.

1683
01:29:20,668 --> 01:29:21,756
Now, don't go away.

1684
01:29:22,757 --> 01:29:25,593
Wait, don't sign it!
Don't sign anything!

1685
01:29:25,659 --> 01:29:27,029
Mr. Patterson, would you
wait out in the hall

1686
01:29:27,054 --> 01:29:28,142
for just a moment, please?

1687
01:29:28,249 --> 01:29:29,833
I'm sure we can straighten
this whole thing out.

1688
01:29:29,858 --> 01:29:30,718
But I assure you...

1689
01:29:30,752 --> 01:29:32,954
And if we don't have it cleared up
in five minutes, we'll sign.

1690
01:29:33,080 --> 01:29:34,148
(Patterson) But I...

1691
01:29:34,612 --> 01:29:37,411
- Penny, wh... what are you doing?
- Joe Woods is the outer office.

1692
01:29:37,584 --> 01:29:39,560
- Why, I'll strangle him!
- Oh, no, you don't.

1693
01:29:39,641 --> 01:29:41,295
He is here for just one reason:

1694
01:29:41,352 --> 01:29:44,539
The show's a smash, he sold it short,
and now he'll wanna make a deal.

1695
01:29:44,679 --> 01:29:46,782
Oh, no, no more deals
with Mr. Joe Woods.

1696
01:29:46,855 --> 01:29:48,557
Oh, but suppose we sell it back to him.

1697
01:29:48,672 --> 01:29:50,653
How can we? It wouldn't be honest.

1698
01:29:50,831 --> 01:29:53,331
Oh, I'm so glad to hear you say that.

1699
01:29:53,748 --> 01:29:55,496
I really thought this business
had changed you.

1700
01:29:55,585 --> 01:29:57,712
But you're still the same sweet guy.

1701
01:29:57,864 --> 01:30:00,815
I'm the one that's changed!
I'll sell it back to him!

1702
01:30:02,326 --> 01:30:04,391
Come on in, Joe!

1703
01:30:04,860 --> 01:30:06,114
Hello, Penny.

1704
01:30:06,406 --> 01:30:07,606
Choirboy.

1705
01:30:07,949 --> 01:30:09,793
Thought I'd drop in and
congratulate you kids...

1706
01:30:09,824 --> 01:30:10,642
Oh, no, you didn't,

1707
01:30:10,666 --> 01:30:13,101
you came to make us an offer
just like everyone else.

1708
01:30:13,187 --> 01:30:16,044
- You've had offers?
- All morning long. Haven't we, dear?

1709
01:30:16,793 --> 01:30:17,900
Well, to be perfectly honest...

1710
01:30:17,924 --> 01:30:19,501
Well, of course you're perfectly honest!

1711
01:30:19,674 --> 01:30:20,986
Joe knows that.

1712
01:30:21,248 --> 01:30:22,324
Don't you, Joe?

1713
01:30:22,439 --> 01:30:24,785
Oh, sure, sure, sure.

1714
01:30:24,852 --> 01:30:26,308
But who's been makin'
those other offers?

1715
01:30:26,342 --> 01:30:27,855
Oh, Mr. Patterson, for one.

1716
01:30:27,978 --> 01:30:29,797
He's a big time operator
from New Jersey.

1717
01:30:29,866 --> 01:30:31,406
Owns a whole city.

1718
01:30:31,574 --> 01:30:33,312
Patterson, New Jersey.

1719
01:30:33,895 --> 01:30:35,050
Patterson?

1720
01:30:35,303 --> 01:30:36,826
Now, look, Penny,
I really don't think...

1721
01:30:36,851 --> 01:30:40,068
Nonsense, Choirboy!
We're not committed to Mr. Patterson.

1722
01:30:40,175 --> 01:30:42,423
We still have the right to
accept an offer from Joe.

1723
01:30:42,516 --> 01:30:43,345
If it's a fair one.

1724
01:30:43,398 --> 01:30:46,694
Well, it just so happens that some of
the boys formed a small syndicate,

1725
01:30:46,758 --> 01:30:49,511
put up a modest sum,
and empowered me to make you an offer.

1726
01:30:49,712 --> 01:30:52,467
- But we can't accept it!
- Let's not be hasty, darling!

1727
01:30:52,565 --> 01:30:54,471
There're lots of tricks
to making a profit.

1728
01:30:54,655 --> 01:30:56,791
- Even with a hit show.
- Oh, yeah, lots of angles.

1729
01:30:56,843 --> 01:30:58,365
That's right,
like replacing you in the show

1730
01:30:58,390 --> 01:30:59,988
when you have to
report back to the Navy.

1731
01:31:00,655 --> 01:31:02,310
You are prepared to make a cash offer?

1732
01:31:02,356 --> 01:31:04,659
My backers have provided me
with a certified check.

1733
01:31:04,699 --> 01:31:06,481
- How much would you take?
- How much is the check for?

1734
01:31:06,506 --> 01:31:08,429
- I asked you first.
- Oh, now quit stalling.

1735
01:31:08,463 --> 01:31:10,576
Joe, give us your best offer,
or we deal with Patterson.

1736
01:31:10,645 --> 01:31:12,567
- No bargaining?
- No bargaining.

1737
01:31:12,832 --> 01:31:15,564
Any producer who knows the ropes
can make a million outta this show.

1738
01:31:15,639 --> 01:31:17,438
Well, what can I do? I'm trapped.

1739
01:31:17,718 --> 01:31:19,007
It's for two hundred thousand.

1740
01:31:19,207 --> 01:31:21,093
Two hundred thousand? We'll take it.

1741
01:31:21,262 --> 01:31:23,917
Now, wait a minute.
I can't let you do this, Mr. Woods.

1742
01:31:24,043 --> 01:31:25,433
There's something
you really oughta know.

1743
01:31:25,487 --> 01:31:28,289
Oh, but there's nothing
Joe doesn't know about this business!

1744
01:31:28,436 --> 01:31:30,798
- Come on, and let him endorse the check.
- But there's trouble.

1745
01:31:30,865 --> 01:31:32,587
There's always trouble,
isn't there, Joe?

1746
01:31:32,647 --> 01:31:33,868
You said it.

1747
01:31:34,195 --> 01:31:37,391
Payment in full for all rights in the
production of "Three Sailors and a Girl"...

1748
01:31:37,960 --> 01:31:41,462
Congratulations, sweetheart.
It's your baby now.

1749
01:31:41,619 --> 01:31:42,691
Come on, let's go.

1750
01:31:42,785 --> 01:31:44,425
Listen, what about Mr. Patterson?

1751
01:31:44,450 --> 01:31:46,989
Come on, Mr. Woods'll
take care of Mr. Patterson.

1752
01:31:47,336 --> 01:31:50,158
Oh... two hundred thousand!

1753
01:31:50,318 --> 01:31:51,333
Listen, Penny...

1754
01:31:51,580 --> 01:31:52,624
Give me that check.

1755
01:31:52,819 --> 01:31:54,930
Choirboy, this might not
be right by Navy standards,

1756
01:31:54,956 --> 01:31:55,977
but this is show business.

1757
01:31:56,059 --> 01:31:58,452
Look, I'd like to strangle
Joe Woods myself,

1758
01:31:58,552 --> 01:32:01,223
but I can't do this to him,
and I can't let you do it.

1759
01:32:01,352 --> 01:32:03,385
Believe me,
I love to hear you say that, but...

1760
01:32:03,511 --> 01:32:05,060
Joe Woods can take care of himself.

1761
01:32:05,106 --> 01:32:06,114
Penny...

1762
01:32:06,350 --> 01:32:07,869
Give me that check.

1763
01:32:11,793 --> 01:32:14,388
- Now, don't gimme no routines.
- Believe me, Mr. Woods...

1764
01:32:14,448 --> 01:32:16,345
Everybody in show business knows you.

1765
01:32:16,405 --> 01:32:18,520
If you're not touting some
phony plagiarism suit,

1766
01:32:18,573 --> 01:32:20,562
you're workin' this "150 percent" dodge.

1767
01:32:20,675 --> 01:32:22,851
Now, there's plenty in this show
to pay off all the investors.

1768
01:32:22,893 --> 01:32:24,178
I'm delighted to hear that.

1769
01:32:24,226 --> 01:32:26,534
- Perhaps a settlement...
- Of what?

1770
01:32:26,667 --> 01:32:28,342
You got no clients.

1771
01:32:28,382 --> 01:32:30,387
You were tryin' to get that kid's
signature on a release,

1772
01:32:30,412 --> 01:32:31,652
and then find clients.

1773
01:32:31,766 --> 01:32:33,748
You're lucky I don't have you arrested!

1774
01:32:33,847 --> 01:32:34,529
Arrested?

1775
01:32:34,579 --> 01:32:37,881
It just so happens you've been tryin' to
pull a racket on the United States Navy,

1776
01:32:37,906 --> 01:32:39,167
to say nothing of the Marine Corps.

1777
01:32:39,219 --> 01:32:41,686
- That's a federal rap.
- A federal rap?

1778
01:32:41,926 --> 01:32:44,460
Look... they're comin' to pick you up.

1779
01:32:44,598 --> 01:32:45,727
Oh, no!

1780
01:32:48,860 --> 01:32:49,877
See?

1781
01:32:53,049 --> 01:32:54,893
Oh... how are you, fellas?

1782
01:32:55,176 --> 01:32:57,972
Go right ahead, buddy,
we're just hangin' around until midnight.

1783
01:32:58,059 --> 01:32:59,153
What happens at midnight?

1784
01:32:59,199 --> 01:33:02,657
At midnight, if you're not on your ship,
you're A.W.O.L.

1785
01:33:02,731 --> 01:33:03,400
Oh.

1786
01:33:03,424 --> 01:33:06,693
Well, I have a show to do tonight.
But don't worry, I'll be there.

1787
01:33:06,808 --> 01:33:07,849
Pardon me.

1788
01:33:08,971 --> 01:33:11,726
[symphonic music]

1789
01:33:11,793 --> 01:33:14,476
♪ Lately I just roll lately ♪

1790
01:33:14,575 --> 01:33:16,244
♪ Just like in a trance ♪

1791
01:33:16,879 --> 01:33:20,312
♪ I got butterflies, butterflies,
all of the time ♪

1792
01:33:22,413 --> 01:33:25,901
♪ And the feeling I feel
is mighty close to sublime ♪

1793
01:33:28,406 --> 01:33:31,138
♪ Lately I don't walk lately ♪

1794
01:33:31,286 --> 01:33:32,947
♪ Lately I just dance ♪

1795
01:33:33,619 --> 01:33:37,018
♪ I got butterflies, butterflies,
all of the while ♪

1796
01:33:39,238 --> 01:33:43,451
♪ And particularly so
I constantly wear a smile ♪

1797
01:33:44,270 --> 01:33:47,615
♪ Yesterday the sun couldn't get... ♪

1798
01:33:47,755 --> 01:33:49,177
- Pardon me, Mr. Woods?
- Yeah?

1799
01:33:49,224 --> 01:33:50,224
Uh...

1800
01:33:50,391 --> 01:33:53,271
I'm with the Marine outfit
that's backing the show and I...

1801
01:33:53,400 --> 01:33:55,243
I hear the Navy is taking
your leading man tonight.

1802
01:33:55,286 --> 01:33:56,897
Well, don't worry about it,
I'll get another.

1803
01:33:56,979 --> 01:33:58,039
I know.

1804
01:33:58,412 --> 01:34:00,312
That's what I wanted
to talk to you about, sir.

1805
01:34:00,519 --> 01:34:01,349
You see, I...

1806
01:34:01,424 --> 01:34:03,745
I... I was wondering
if maybe you could...

1807
01:34:04,612 --> 01:34:06,567
What I mean to say is...

1808
01:34:07,327 --> 01:34:09,163
You see, I...
I used to be with the circus once,

1809
01:34:09,190 --> 01:34:11,646
and... and friends of mine think that
I have a great deal of...

1810
01:34:12,673 --> 01:34:15,944
Well, I don't mean to
sound conceited, but I was...

1811
01:34:16,593 --> 01:34:17,745
Sorry, son.

1812
01:34:18,092 --> 01:34:20,114
I know talent the minute
it taps me on the shoulder.

1813
01:34:20,172 --> 01:34:21,645
You just ain't got it, kid.

1814
01:34:25,093 --> 01:34:27,926
Gosh, Joe...
Weren't you a little rough on that boy?

1815
01:34:28,072 --> 01:34:29,537
I thought he had something.

1816
01:34:29,777 --> 01:34:32,413
Kindest thing I ever did for him.
Never get anywhere in this business.

1817
01:34:32,534 --> 01:34:34,649
Looks too much like Burt Lancaster.

1818
01:34:35,299 --> 01:34:37,611
♪ They say we're in love ♪

1819
01:34:38,286 --> 01:34:40,487
♪ They say we're in love ♪

1820
01:34:41,166 --> 01:34:43,599
♪ They say we're in love ♪

1821
01:34:43,686 --> 01:34:46,319
♪ Love is here ♪

1822
01:34:47,393 --> 01:34:52,741
♪ To stay ♪

1823
01:34:55,060 --> 01:34:56,993
[audience applauding]

1824
01:35:00,739 --> 01:35:02,672
[symphonic music]